The sample

The fertility center waiting room normally has a number of women in it, particularly in the morning as they go in for blood work, ultrasounds, and the like. And as a patient myself, when a man walks in alone, you pretty much know what he's there to do...give a semen sample for analysis. So as you recall from my last post, today was the day of DH's semen analysis and like the journalist I like to pretend to be, I sat down with him when he got home to get the real story.

He noted that the "number of women" in the waiting room paused in their reading as he signed in at the front desk (I'm sure they all thought the same thing I do - "I know why he's here.") When they called his name, they took him back to "the room" to do his business. They handed him a sterile cup and gave him his instructions. Then he was alone.

The room itself was tiny and contained the following: a toilet, a sink, a chair (I guess in case you're more comfortable jerking off in a seated position), a table with a couple stacks of porn magazines (think Hustler), and a muted TV with a DVD all ready for him to press play.

So he picked up a magazine - some International something - and started purusing. As he flipped the pages two thoughts came to his mind - 1) there are an awful lot of ads in porn magazines, specifically tranny ads and 2) he stumbled across a picture of a hot chick but found he was spending his time reading the article. As he put it "hey, she's alright...and oh, she's a Detroit native." WAY TOO FUNNY!!!!

So since the magazine was a bust (pardon the pun) he moved onto the DVD. So in the movie, a good looking babe (a little on the heavy side which thank god he likes or he would have looked right past me) strolls around the pool area wearing a bikini. The bikini comes off and a couple minutes later DH is handing his sample off to the lab tech.

Now during my interview with him, I tried to maintain my journalistic composure but it was just not happening. He was a great sport about the whole thing and I really appreciate him being interviewed for my blog. And hey, other than having to go through this same process again when it's time for E/R and getting some blood drawn next week, he's got it pretty easy in this IVF process. But again, thanks DH for letting me and our readers know what a semen analysis is really like!