Today we're 12 weeks pregnant, WOOHOO!!! Like I've said before, every week is a milestone that we truly celebrate. And by this time next week, we'll be in our 2nd trimester...that's really something to look forward to. This week I've been feeling yucky at night. Just some nausea and only in the late afternoon/evening but NOTHING sounds appetizing. I've ended up eating breakfast foods for dinner (brinner) almost every night because it's the only thing I could stomach.
So yesterday was DH's birthday where he turned the big 30 so a big HAPPY BIRTHDAY to him. I feel so old, I can't even remember turning 30 LOL. Anyways, we had a nice day together. Went out for lunch, picked up a cake, and had pancakes for dinner (yep, more brinner.) Just think on his next birthday we'll have a little smiling baby to celebrate with us, can't wait!
Monday's surgery is quickly approaching and I've surprisingly been able to distract myself from my nervousness. Been reading, a lot, which is one of my favorite pasttimes. Today I'm going to venture to visit the family since I visited DH's side on Christmas weekend (and my original planned trip on Monday got postponed with the snowstorm.) So I think that visit will keep my mind occupied quite a bit too.
The hospital called me yesterday and I need to be there Monday at 5:30am. The surgery should occur about an hour or so after I arrive and I'm super thankful for a really early surgery. That will give me a lot of time there on Monday to start walking around and hopefully (got everything crossed) I could be home by Tuesday morning.
Tomorrow I'll get the results from the 1st trimester blood work. So I'll let you know how those came out and I'll be sure to post the night before my surgery. Have a super Thursday!
Us
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Monday, December 27, 2010
11w4d - NT scan looked great
Back from our appointment and everything's looking great so far. The little one was so cute again on the u/s. When they first put the u/s on, it was laying there with it's back facing us. I was scared for a second because I couldn't see the h/b, but then that beautiful flickering appeared and I could breathe again. Then for the first minute or so it wouldn't change positions so the u/s tech pushed a few times on my stomach - we needed the baby to turn into the right position to do the NT measurements. Well after one of the pushes the baby flipped around a couple times, did some kicks and then settled into the perfect position for the measurements. Nice & easy the rest of the way. The u/s tech measured the nuchal translucency 3 times (per their procedure) and the measurements were 1.37, 1.43, and 1.3mm. Great measurements for where we're at at 11w4d. And a nasal bone was present and measureable (the absence of a nasal bone can be an indicator of Down's.) The nurse then did the finger prick for the bloodwork and I should have those results by Friday. But so far, we're looking good.
Next we were onto the vitals - b/p was 122/74 which is about my usual, pulse was 75. Weight gain so far in the first trimester is 3.5 pounds. The doctor listened to my heart, my breathing, and did a breast exam...a very thorough breast exam. I was wondering what DH thought about this very thorough breast exam as he sat in the room and watched - was he uncomfortable watching that? No. On the contrary his thoughts were - "Hell yeah" (a common reaction to the sight of my rack.) This was followed by him thinking "So it ain't just me -they really are that big. They don't fit in his hands either." Good god, my husband makes me laugh!!! I love you honey!
We then met with the doctor in his office to fill out the paperwork for surgery on Monday. I should get a call from the hospital this week telling me what time we have to be there on Monday. By this time next week, I'll be recovering in the hospital (oh, how I hate trying to sleep in a hospital bed, but it will all be worth it.)
Well, here are some pictures from today's u/s.
Baby with his hand up by his mouth (we could even count all 10 fingers on today's u/s.)
On it's side. The crown rump length from this angle measured 5.47cm making it measure a few days ahead at 12w1d.
Similar shot to the one above, but you'll notice the crown rump length measured slightly smaller, dating it to 12w0d. (You can see why the measurements can be off a little.)
Pic from when they measured the nasal bone.
I seriously think I'm going to need a photo album for this baby just for his/her u/s pics!
Next we were onto the vitals - b/p was 122/74 which is about my usual, pulse was 75. Weight gain so far in the first trimester is 3.5 pounds. The doctor listened to my heart, my breathing, and did a breast exam...a very thorough breast exam. I was wondering what DH thought about this very thorough breast exam as he sat in the room and watched - was he uncomfortable watching that? No. On the contrary his thoughts were - "Hell yeah" (a common reaction to the sight of my rack.) This was followed by him thinking "So it ain't just me -they really are that big. They don't fit in his hands either." Good god, my husband makes me laugh!!! I love you honey!
We then met with the doctor in his office to fill out the paperwork for surgery on Monday. I should get a call from the hospital this week telling me what time we have to be there on Monday. By this time next week, I'll be recovering in the hospital (oh, how I hate trying to sleep in a hospital bed, but it will all be worth it.)
Well, here are some pictures from today's u/s.
Baby with his hand up by his mouth (we could even count all 10 fingers on today's u/s.)
On it's side. The crown rump length from this angle measured 5.47cm making it measure a few days ahead at 12w1d.
Similar shot to the one above, but you'll notice the crown rump length measured slightly smaller, dating it to 12w0d. (You can see why the measurements can be off a little.)
Pic from when they measured the nasal bone.
I seriously think I'm going to need a photo album for this baby just for his/her u/s pics!
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Belated Merry Christmas!
Hello all! Hope you all had a very Merry Christmas! Mine was nice - went to the in-laws for the holiday and spent Christmas with them and some of our Rhode Island friends. Our trip was cut short slightly when we heard about the snowstorm coming so we high-tailed it home late last night. VERY wise decision...not only did we beat the snow but traffic late on Christmas night was super light. Awesome! And now we are snowed in quite nicely with nowhere to travel tonight, perfect.
Tomorrow we'll do our first trimester screening at 1pm (hmmm, I wonder if the snow will change this plan at all, I really hope not.) Anyways, I did not have these tests when I had my first two children ages ago. This test is made up of two components. A blood test and an ultrasound. The ultrasound is used to measure the amount of fluid behind the baby's neck (nuchal translucency.) A larger measurement typically equates to a higher risk of Down's syndrome, Trisomy 18, or Trisomy 13. But it's important for DH & I to remember that this is not a diagnostic test, this is just a screening test. There are a large amount of false positives in the b/w & u/s so that's something to keep in mind. If our risk is high, we could then decide to proceed with CVS (chorionic villus sampling) or amniocentesis to get an actual diagnosis (or to get the all clear.) To be honest though we most likely would not move onto any diagnostic tests. Partially because we don't want to add any additional risks of miscarriage and two, we would not terminate the pregnancy anyways unless the abnormality was incompatible with life. Hopefully we will not have to cross that bridge.
So some may ask, why bother even doing the first trimester screening? Well, it is optional so we certainly don't have to do it. However, if we find that our risk is very low we can have that piece of mind. And if we find that our risk is high, we know to look for other markers in future ultrasounds. Future u/s findings could confirm the initial screening results or completely dispell them. But if confirmed, we could begin to prepare and educate ourselves on whatever help our baby may need. So we're proceeding with the tests tomorrow and we should have the full results by the end of the week. Again, the results would not be a diagnosis. It will just provide us with our level of risk.
On another note, I can't believe my surgery is 8 days away. WOW! I can't even imagine how I'll be feeling next Sunday night. Ummm...I'll guess nervous, anxious, and more nervous. Will I be able to sleep? Oh, I so doubt it!! I'm already nervous just thinking about how I'll be feeling. I think I better dig out my old New Age CD's and get my meditation groove on.
Will report back tomorrow! For now, hope all my friends & family on the East coast are snuggling in with some hot chocolate while the snow falls and falls and falls and falls....
Tomorrow we'll do our first trimester screening at 1pm (hmmm, I wonder if the snow will change this plan at all, I really hope not.) Anyways, I did not have these tests when I had my first two children ages ago. This test is made up of two components. A blood test and an ultrasound. The ultrasound is used to measure the amount of fluid behind the baby's neck (nuchal translucency.) A larger measurement typically equates to a higher risk of Down's syndrome, Trisomy 18, or Trisomy 13. But it's important for DH & I to remember that this is not a diagnostic test, this is just a screening test. There are a large amount of false positives in the b/w & u/s so that's something to keep in mind. If our risk is high, we could then decide to proceed with CVS (chorionic villus sampling) or amniocentesis to get an actual diagnosis (or to get the all clear.) To be honest though we most likely would not move onto any diagnostic tests. Partially because we don't want to add any additional risks of miscarriage and two, we would not terminate the pregnancy anyways unless the abnormality was incompatible with life. Hopefully we will not have to cross that bridge.
So some may ask, why bother even doing the first trimester screening? Well, it is optional so we certainly don't have to do it. However, if we find that our risk is very low we can have that piece of mind. And if we find that our risk is high, we know to look for other markers in future ultrasounds. Future u/s findings could confirm the initial screening results or completely dispell them. But if confirmed, we could begin to prepare and educate ourselves on whatever help our baby may need. So we're proceeding with the tests tomorrow and we should have the full results by the end of the week. Again, the results would not be a diagnosis. It will just provide us with our level of risk.
On another note, I can't believe my surgery is 8 days away. WOW! I can't even imagine how I'll be feeling next Sunday night. Ummm...I'll guess nervous, anxious, and more nervous. Will I be able to sleep? Oh, I so doubt it!! I'm already nervous just thinking about how I'll be feeling. I think I better dig out my old New Age CD's and get my meditation groove on.
Will report back tomorrow! For now, hope all my friends & family on the East coast are snuggling in with some hot chocolate while the snow falls and falls and falls and falls....
Thursday, December 23, 2010
11 weeks - another milestone (& some pics!)
No bleeding this morning YAY!! Just the familiar brown spotting, but hey, I'm ok with that. Just no more red please! As promised, here are some pictures for you. Here is the baby at 10w6d from yesterday's ultrasound. DH & I both have "prominent" noses and it appears our baby does too.
A shot mid-wave.
And the first of many baby bump shots. This was from this morning, so 11 weeks exactly. (And no, I did not grow to be 7 feet tall, we just have a very small Christmas tree so I am taller than it.)
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
All is a-ok
The spotting this week and bleed from this morning are mysteries but the baby is doing fine...phew!!!
The little one was doing great, kicking and stretching and flipping around (and DH got to see it this time.) Heartbeat was beautiful in the 160's. The cervix is closed and the length remains the same. The placenta looks good and is firmly attached - no sign of separation or anything like that. The 2nd sac is still there, still getting squeezed out of the way, but it's about the same size as last week so no real change there. It may be possible that the spotting & bleeding came with the stop in progesterone late last week, but it's hard to tell. At this point we're just relieved to hear that everything looked great with the baby & pregnancy. It won't be instant panic-mode if I have additional spotting/bleeding over the holiday weekend, thank goodness!
Tomorrow I'll post a couple pics of the baby from today's u/s and will post the first (of many to come) baby bump shots. Right now, it's nap time.
The little one was doing great, kicking and stretching and flipping around (and DH got to see it this time.) Heartbeat was beautiful in the 160's. The cervix is closed and the length remains the same. The placenta looks good and is firmly attached - no sign of separation or anything like that. The 2nd sac is still there, still getting squeezed out of the way, but it's about the same size as last week so no real change there. It may be possible that the spotting & bleeding came with the stop in progesterone late last week, but it's hard to tell. At this point we're just relieved to hear that everything looked great with the baby & pregnancy. It won't be instant panic-mode if I have additional spotting/bleeding over the holiday weekend, thank goodness!
Tomorrow I'll post a couple pics of the baby from today's u/s and will post the first (of many to come) baby bump shots. Right now, it's nap time.
10w6d - Where is this blood coming from?
So much for a quiet week with no doctor appointments. So much for a week with no worrying. Here DH & I have been admiring my baby bump and feeling more confident in this pregnancy. We listened to the heartbeat again yesterday, that reassuring galloping sound and we were going to post a picture of my baby bump tomorrow when we hit 11 weeks. But today's events and even those of the last few days remind me that this week hasn't been all sunshine and lollipops.
Let's backtrack to last Thursday morning, where on the day of my great appointment with a great ultrasound, I had a touch of pink spotting. Nothing major at all and it looked very similar to when I'd had a bit of spotting earlier in the pregnancy. That we'd chalked up to the progesterone irritating the cervix and there was no evidence of anything amiss in the u/s on Thursday so no big deal. Later that day, I finished my progesterone and hoped that the irritation to my cervix would be over now that I was no longer using the suppositories.
Well, the last few days I've had spotting, primarily brown in color, which generally indicates "old" blood. At first this didn't worry me much either because I figured it could be "old" spotting from the progesterone irritation. Or perhaps a bit of spotting after stopping the progesterone which is common also. No problem, right? Right - that is if it were not getting progressively heavier each day. This morning was the kicker though - when I went to the bathroom first thing this morning it was red and it was more than spotting. I'd call it a light flow. TMI alert - it was enough to cover the toilet paper I was using and drip red into the toilet. Now subsequent trips to the bathroom and we're back to the brown spotting, though cramping has been present all morning. So where did that red blood come from? It had pooled in there and all came out at once but where did it originate? Why am I cramping?
A call to Dr D and I'm reminded again why this guy is wonderful. The number he provides his patients forwards to his cell phone. Yes, no explaining what's happening to a nurse and then waiting for the call back. It's a direct line to him. I explained what's happening and I'll go see him this afternoon at the hospital he's at today. I've never been to this hospital before, it's a little further away but that's ok with me. If we can get any clues from today's visit maybe I can relax while we're visiting friends & family this Christmas weekend and not completely panic at every sight of blood (note, I still will panic, but will try not to completely panic.)
So, I'll post again later today once I'm back from the doctor. I seriously hope it's nothing and I come home feeling silly for even bothering him today with this. But seeing red is enough to warrant a trip to make sure all is ok. Please, please, please let everything be ok.
Let's backtrack to last Thursday morning, where on the day of my great appointment with a great ultrasound, I had a touch of pink spotting. Nothing major at all and it looked very similar to when I'd had a bit of spotting earlier in the pregnancy. That we'd chalked up to the progesterone irritating the cervix and there was no evidence of anything amiss in the u/s on Thursday so no big deal. Later that day, I finished my progesterone and hoped that the irritation to my cervix would be over now that I was no longer using the suppositories.
Well, the last few days I've had spotting, primarily brown in color, which generally indicates "old" blood. At first this didn't worry me much either because I figured it could be "old" spotting from the progesterone irritation. Or perhaps a bit of spotting after stopping the progesterone which is common also. No problem, right? Right - that is if it were not getting progressively heavier each day. This morning was the kicker though - when I went to the bathroom first thing this morning it was red and it was more than spotting. I'd call it a light flow. TMI alert - it was enough to cover the toilet paper I was using and drip red into the toilet. Now subsequent trips to the bathroom and we're back to the brown spotting, though cramping has been present all morning. So where did that red blood come from? It had pooled in there and all came out at once but where did it originate? Why am I cramping?
A call to Dr D and I'm reminded again why this guy is wonderful. The number he provides his patients forwards to his cell phone. Yes, no explaining what's happening to a nurse and then waiting for the call back. It's a direct line to him. I explained what's happening and I'll go see him this afternoon at the hospital he's at today. I've never been to this hospital before, it's a little further away but that's ok with me. If we can get any clues from today's visit maybe I can relax while we're visiting friends & family this Christmas weekend and not completely panic at every sight of blood (note, I still will panic, but will try not to completely panic.)
So, I'll post again later today once I'm back from the doctor. I seriously hope it's nothing and I come home feeling silly for even bothering him today with this. But seeing red is enough to warrant a trip to make sure all is ok. Please, please, please let everything be ok.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
10 weeks - fabulous appointment, fabulous pictures!
We're 10 weeks pregnant today and I got to take a nice long look at Baby Alvarez today!! (Unfortunately DH had to work right at the time of my appointment so he couldn't be there...grrrr!!) So I'll tell you about my appointment and then share some pics from it.
The u/s tech at the MFM's is just awesome. She was pointing out everything as she went. The doc popped in for a few minutes to say hi and see how things were looking, then let her continue on with the u/s. The baby was kicking and waving and stretching!! It was just absolutely amazing, especially considering the little one is only about an inch long. At one point when I was telling the u/s tech that DH is in the Army, the baby raised it's hand up by it's head - she's like "hey that looked like a salute!" (Oh how I wished DH could have been there to see it!) She then switched to another view to look at blood flow and you could see the heart area and umbilical cord light up. And lastly she switched to 3d a few times which was beyond cool and she gave me a couple of shots in 3d to take home. Amazing, amazing stuff! You have to remember the last time I had a baby, they did 1 or maybe 2 u/s for the entire pregnancy and they didn't give you pictures to take home. Also, the quality of the scans these days is like a million times better than 18-20 years ago so it really was astounding to see so much so soon. We could even see the fingers for crying out loud!!!
So then I met with Dr D. We reviewed my pap results and prenatal b/w results - all great - and now that we have all of my results back & saw the baby moving with that beautiful heart beating away, we've got the all clear for my TAC surgery on January 3rd. We went through my list of questions - and again I must say, I've never had a doctor take as much time with a patient as Dr D. does. While most docs rush you in and out and you completely forget what you were going to ask them in your "drive-thru" appointment, Dr D takes his time and explains everything. Then he sits back and asks "what other questions do you have?" and we move on to my next question. Never do I feel rushed and I just love that.
So we talked more about the surgery - I should be fine with an epidural/spinal type of anesthesia instead of general anesthesia which makes me very, very happy. Never having had an epidural/spinal (because back when I had kids they didn't offer it during labor like they do now) I was wondering how long it took to wear off. Depending on the type they give me, the surgery should take just under an hour, the block should wear off in 2-4 hours, and I should be out of my hospital bed and walking around as soon as it wears off. About 70-80% of his patients are discharged from the hospital in 24 hours so I'm going to try like hell to be part of that percentage. When I go for my first trimester screening on 12/27, we'll do all of the paperwork for the surgery and I'll go across the street to meet with the pre-op folks at the hospital to get that all squared away.
We also talked about those fun topics like constipation & sex...well, that's an interesting combination, huh? Right now constipation is not terrible, but history shows that surgery + painkillers are not kind to my bowels. After my last surgery in August I was eating prunes like they were going out of style and by the time I finally went, I was literally crying, I screamed once, and for a moment I thought I was going to die. (Ok, mild exaggeration on that last bit, but damnit that was fucking painful!!) So first thing I need to do is up my fluid intake to an 8oz glass every waking hour. I guess I will just move into the bathroom, but hey, whatever it takes. He also suggested having a cool air humidifier in the bedroom at night. Apparently with our forced air heat I could easily be losing a liter of fluids just breathing all that hot air at night so the humidifier should help with that. And then if I don't get enough relief with the increase of fluids & humidifier, I can add a stool softener before bed.
We also talked about sex and DH & I will continue our refrain until after the surgery. Boo hiss!! Oh, how we both miss it...I swear this is torture! But at this point it's safer for us to refrain. An orgasm on my part & prostaglandins in semen can both cause uterine contractions so we need to avoid those for now. It's been a long couple of months of waiting and we'll have to wait a bit longer, but hopefully after the healing from the surgery is done, we'll get the green light to live (and love) like a normal pregnant couple...well almost...we'll still have to use condoms to avoid the prostaglandin risk. Nothing like safe sex during pregnancy. :-)
So, onto the pics from today...
The first, a view from the side. Oh, it looks like a baby now instead of a blob!!
This one is looking straight at him/her. Love those little arms & legs. Some of the white areas on the head are where facial bones are forming.
This one is kind of looking down on him/her. Again, can see the arms and legs.
This is when the baby "saluted". Raised his/her arm up so the hand was right up by the head.
This is one of the 3d pictures. AWESOME!!
And this is my favorite. It's just an amazing picture and I could look at it all day. I love how you can see the whole baby and the umbilical cord. LOVE IT!!!
Well, I must go finish making dinner. But had to share my great appointment and great pics with you all!
The u/s tech at the MFM's is just awesome. She was pointing out everything as she went. The doc popped in for a few minutes to say hi and see how things were looking, then let her continue on with the u/s. The baby was kicking and waving and stretching!! It was just absolutely amazing, especially considering the little one is only about an inch long. At one point when I was telling the u/s tech that DH is in the Army, the baby raised it's hand up by it's head - she's like "hey that looked like a salute!" (Oh how I wished DH could have been there to see it!) She then switched to another view to look at blood flow and you could see the heart area and umbilical cord light up. And lastly she switched to 3d a few times which was beyond cool and she gave me a couple of shots in 3d to take home. Amazing, amazing stuff! You have to remember the last time I had a baby, they did 1 or maybe 2 u/s for the entire pregnancy and they didn't give you pictures to take home. Also, the quality of the scans these days is like a million times better than 18-20 years ago so it really was astounding to see so much so soon. We could even see the fingers for crying out loud!!!
So then I met with Dr D. We reviewed my pap results and prenatal b/w results - all great - and now that we have all of my results back & saw the baby moving with that beautiful heart beating away, we've got the all clear for my TAC surgery on January 3rd. We went through my list of questions - and again I must say, I've never had a doctor take as much time with a patient as Dr D. does. While most docs rush you in and out and you completely forget what you were going to ask them in your "drive-thru" appointment, Dr D takes his time and explains everything. Then he sits back and asks "what other questions do you have?" and we move on to my next question. Never do I feel rushed and I just love that.
So we talked more about the surgery - I should be fine with an epidural/spinal type of anesthesia instead of general anesthesia which makes me very, very happy. Never having had an epidural/spinal (because back when I had kids they didn't offer it during labor like they do now) I was wondering how long it took to wear off. Depending on the type they give me, the surgery should take just under an hour, the block should wear off in 2-4 hours, and I should be out of my hospital bed and walking around as soon as it wears off. About 70-80% of his patients are discharged from the hospital in 24 hours so I'm going to try like hell to be part of that percentage. When I go for my first trimester screening on 12/27, we'll do all of the paperwork for the surgery and I'll go across the street to meet with the pre-op folks at the hospital to get that all squared away.
We also talked about those fun topics like constipation & sex...well, that's an interesting combination, huh? Right now constipation is not terrible, but history shows that surgery + painkillers are not kind to my bowels. After my last surgery in August I was eating prunes like they were going out of style and by the time I finally went, I was literally crying, I screamed once, and for a moment I thought I was going to die. (Ok, mild exaggeration on that last bit, but damnit that was fucking painful!!) So first thing I need to do is up my fluid intake to an 8oz glass every waking hour. I guess I will just move into the bathroom, but hey, whatever it takes. He also suggested having a cool air humidifier in the bedroom at night. Apparently with our forced air heat I could easily be losing a liter of fluids just breathing all that hot air at night so the humidifier should help with that. And then if I don't get enough relief with the increase of fluids & humidifier, I can add a stool softener before bed.
We also talked about sex and DH & I will continue our refrain until after the surgery. Boo hiss!! Oh, how we both miss it...I swear this is torture! But at this point it's safer for us to refrain. An orgasm on my part & prostaglandins in semen can both cause uterine contractions so we need to avoid those for now. It's been a long couple of months of waiting and we'll have to wait a bit longer, but hopefully after the healing from the surgery is done, we'll get the green light to live (and love) like a normal pregnant couple...well almost...we'll still have to use condoms to avoid the prostaglandin risk. Nothing like safe sex during pregnancy. :-)
So, onto the pics from today...
The first, a view from the side. Oh, it looks like a baby now instead of a blob!!
This one is looking straight at him/her. Love those little arms & legs. Some of the white areas on the head are where facial bones are forming.
This one is kind of looking down on him/her. Again, can see the arms and legs.
This is when the baby "saluted". Raised his/her arm up so the hand was right up by the head.
This is one of the 3d pictures. AWESOME!!
And this is my favorite. It's just an amazing picture and I could look at it all day. I love how you can see the whole baby and the umbilical cord. LOVE IT!!!
Well, I must go finish making dinner. But had to share my great appointment and great pics with you all!
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Sorry, been a slacker!
Hi there! Long time no talk to. Well, it's been so quiet in my life, I haven't had much to report (and I actually still don't have much.)
In school news, I'm just waiting for my professor to post the final exam so I can take that and be done (my other class finished last week.) And this past weekend, we had my DD's baby shower. It was beautiful and she was soooo happy. DH & I spent the night before the shower at her house and she was hilarious. She was so excited for her shower she was literally counting down the hours until the party started.
I just worked my last day of 2010 today...ahhhhh...I am now officially out of the office until January 13th! My holiday break runs through the new year and then my surgery break will run from January 3rd - January 13th. I may not need all of that time to recover, but better to err on the side of caution instead of thinking I'm superwoman and trying to do too much too soon (wait, isn't doing too much too soon the Kling way?) Those that know my family know that stubbornly doing too much is in our blood.
Anyways, I've read many other women's blogs and stories of their TAC surgeries and many said it took them a good 3-6 weeks to recover. Most said they were able to work after 2-3 weeks so I'm thinking 10 days is a good number of days to plan to be out of work. After that I can work from my living room anyways and I'll just make myself as comfy as possible. Like I said, the incision is similar to a c-section incision but they pull the bladder and uterus out of the way to put the loop around the upper part of the cervix. Then you just have to account for the fact that I'll be 13-14 weeks pregnant during the first week or so of recovery time so that may make things a bit uncomfortable (think expanding pregnant belly pushing against c-section like incision - definitely doesn't sound like the most pleasant feeling in the world.)
So yes, the internet is both a blessing and a curse. I've read story after story of women undergoing the surgery I'll be having and it's wonderful to read so many experiences (especially the many that had the same doctor I have.) I definitely still get nervous at the thought of the surgery but every story is reassuring. So while I probably didn't need to look at pictures of the surgery with the uterus pulled out of the c-section incision (when I realized it will soon be my uterus hanging out there I realized that maybe there really is such a thing as too much information) the stories have been wonderful to help me know what to expect before, during, and after the surgery.
Lastly, we got our home doppler so we could listen to the heartbeat every few days. Last week we tried, but couldn't really pick anything up (we knew it would probably be too early.) But this week we tried again and heard that beautiful galloping sound with a reading of 155. Hmm...baby seems to like that range of the 150's which is making some people guess that we're having a girl. I think a gender poll is in order, you think?
Thursday we go see Dr D for an OB check and will get some more details about surgery prep & surgery day. Hopefully we'll get an u/s peek at our little gummy bear too. We'll be 10 weeks on Thursday so there should be lots more to see. But I'll post after that appointment to let you know how it went. Until then, thanks for putting up with my slacker ways.
In school news, I'm just waiting for my professor to post the final exam so I can take that and be done (my other class finished last week.) And this past weekend, we had my DD's baby shower. It was beautiful and she was soooo happy. DH & I spent the night before the shower at her house and she was hilarious. She was so excited for her shower she was literally counting down the hours until the party started.
I just worked my last day of 2010 today...ahhhhh...I am now officially out of the office until January 13th! My holiday break runs through the new year and then my surgery break will run from January 3rd - January 13th. I may not need all of that time to recover, but better to err on the side of caution instead of thinking I'm superwoman and trying to do too much too soon (wait, isn't doing too much too soon the Kling way?) Those that know my family know that stubbornly doing too much is in our blood.
Anyways, I've read many other women's blogs and stories of their TAC surgeries and many said it took them a good 3-6 weeks to recover. Most said they were able to work after 2-3 weeks so I'm thinking 10 days is a good number of days to plan to be out of work. After that I can work from my living room anyways and I'll just make myself as comfy as possible. Like I said, the incision is similar to a c-section incision but they pull the bladder and uterus out of the way to put the loop around the upper part of the cervix. Then you just have to account for the fact that I'll be 13-14 weeks pregnant during the first week or so of recovery time so that may make things a bit uncomfortable (think expanding pregnant belly pushing against c-section like incision - definitely doesn't sound like the most pleasant feeling in the world.)
So yes, the internet is both a blessing and a curse. I've read story after story of women undergoing the surgery I'll be having and it's wonderful to read so many experiences (especially the many that had the same doctor I have.) I definitely still get nervous at the thought of the surgery but every story is reassuring. So while I probably didn't need to look at pictures of the surgery with the uterus pulled out of the c-section incision (when I realized it will soon be my uterus hanging out there I realized that maybe there really is such a thing as too much information) the stories have been wonderful to help me know what to expect before, during, and after the surgery.
Lastly, we got our home doppler so we could listen to the heartbeat every few days. Last week we tried, but couldn't really pick anything up (we knew it would probably be too early.) But this week we tried again and heard that beautiful galloping sound with a reading of 155. Hmm...baby seems to like that range of the 150's which is making some people guess that we're having a girl. I think a gender poll is in order, you think?
Thursday we go see Dr D for an OB check and will get some more details about surgery prep & surgery day. Hopefully we'll get an u/s peek at our little gummy bear too. We'll be 10 weeks on Thursday so there should be lots more to see. But I'll post after that appointment to let you know how it went. Until then, thanks for putting up with my slacker ways.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
9 weeks today!!
It's been an incredibly busy week this week at work. After today I only have 3 workdays left in 2010 so I'm trying to wrap everything up before my long holiday break. So no lunch breaks here - instead lunches this week have consisted of scarfing down an PB&J english muffin with a string cheese on the side (or some days celery & cream cheese on the side) while I listened to a web meeting/conference call and furiously scribbled my notes. But today, I'm taking a solid 15 minute lunch break to catch up on my blog (I already ate my aforementioned PB&J english muffin with a string cheese on the side while listening to a web meeting/conference call and furiously scribbling my notes.)
So, 9 weeks today!! WOO-HOO!! Each week with this pregnancy feels like such a milestone. And I'm also enjoying a week of no doctor appointments. That's right - NO doctor's appointments this week!! I looked back on the calendar we keep hanging in the kitchen and I saw that the last time I had a week with NO doctor's appointment was the week of September 5th. September 5th?? Isn't that ridiculous?? Yes it is! But after that week of September 5th, I have had at least one appointment with a medical professional every week - whether it was b/w, u/s, e/r, e/t, physical therapy, or the dermatologist. Now you can really see why a week of no doctor's appointments is a welcome and refreshing change of pace!
I'm feeling great this week! Still craving cold fruit more than anything, not as tired (but not bursting with energy either) and my jeans are getting a little tighter. My weight hasn't gone up and I think a lot of it is still bloat (and the fact that I'm no skinny minny to begin with), but I think my time remaining in buttoned non-maternity jeans may be limited.
Ok, back to cramming in 3 weeks worth of work in 3 days. Later!!
So, 9 weeks today!! WOO-HOO!! Each week with this pregnancy feels like such a milestone. And I'm also enjoying a week of no doctor appointments. That's right - NO doctor's appointments this week!! I looked back on the calendar we keep hanging in the kitchen and I saw that the last time I had a week with NO doctor's appointment was the week of September 5th. September 5th?? Isn't that ridiculous?? Yes it is! But after that week of September 5th, I have had at least one appointment with a medical professional every week - whether it was b/w, u/s, e/r, e/t, physical therapy, or the dermatologist. Now you can really see why a week of no doctor's appointments is a welcome and refreshing change of pace!
I'm feeling great this week! Still craving cold fruit more than anything, not as tired (but not bursting with energy either) and my jeans are getting a little tighter. My weight hasn't gone up and I think a lot of it is still bloat (and the fact that I'm no skinny minny to begin with), but I think my time remaining in buttoned non-maternity jeans may be limited.
Ok, back to cramming in 3 weeks worth of work in 3 days. Later!!
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Quiet and uneventful...boy that feels nice!
It's been a few days since my last post and I'm happy to report life's been pretty quiet and uneventful...nice!
Yesterday was the day of pregnancy related errands. First stop was the pharmacy up in Trenton that carries the fertility meds and related stuff. If you'll remember I'm still on the progesterone suppositories and estrogen tablets for another week and a half - until December 16th to be exact, when I will be 10 weeks pregnant. I will be sooooo happy to finish taking these meds. The progesterone suppositories are a cool $100 every week so I think my wallet will enjoy me no longer using them. I'll also be happy to ditch the pantiliners again for awhile. You can't use progesterone suppositories without "making a mess" so I'll be happy to say goodbye to daily doses of white goop. So yes, after spending another $200 at that pharmacy yesterday I was extremely happy to say thank you & goodbye to them for good!
Next stop was CVS to pick up my prescription prenatal vitamins. Interesting thing though - they are not covered by either of my insurance plans. WTF??? We encourage women to take their prenatal vitamins (I've been taking over-the-counter prenatals for 2.5 years now to keep my folic acid levels up) and yet they won't cover them under the insurance?? Weird stuff! I still wonder if the pharmacy tech screwed up, because it just seems odd. Ah well, the over the counter ones are just as good according to the doc so maybe I'll stick with them.
And while at CVS I stopped at the Minute Clinic for my flu shot. (It should have been named the 45-Minute Clinic as I was 3rd in line which meant a 45 minute wait for a 5 minute visit.) But I must say it was convenient to just walk in and get it there and not have to worry about finding a general doctor, making an appointment, etc. I've had the flu once in 20 years so I generally don't bother with a flu shot, but knowing how dangerous the flu/H1N1 can be to pregnant women, I was told to get it, and the sooner the better. So got that taken care of.
The rest of the weekend I spent writing my term paper for my art class. I should be wrapping up my 2 classes later this week. Then I probably won't take anymore classes for awhile given that life is going to change gears when the baby arrives. Hell, I've taken classes here and there over the last 20 years, what's another 10 or 20 years? I'm obviously in no rush to get a degree, it's just one of those things I'd like to accomplish before I die so I've got plenty of time.
How am I feeling in general? Really only symptoms at this point are I burp (a LOT), I become suddenly ravenous and must eat immediately, and I would like to nap every afternoon. In the earlier weeks I was craving salty stuff (green olives, spaghettios, etc) but that has changed. This last week I just cannot get enough fruit! Any kind of fruit is good but cold fruit is best: melon, a mango out of the fridge, jars of the ruby red grapefruit sections. The other day I finished the grapefruit and then stood at the kitchen sink to drink the juice right out of the jar...can anyone say attractive??
Hope everyone has a good week and for now we'll just keep plugging along quietly and uneventfully!
Yesterday was the day of pregnancy related errands. First stop was the pharmacy up in Trenton that carries the fertility meds and related stuff. If you'll remember I'm still on the progesterone suppositories and estrogen tablets for another week and a half - until December 16th to be exact, when I will be 10 weeks pregnant. I will be sooooo happy to finish taking these meds. The progesterone suppositories are a cool $100 every week so I think my wallet will enjoy me no longer using them. I'll also be happy to ditch the pantiliners again for awhile. You can't use progesterone suppositories without "making a mess" so I'll be happy to say goodbye to daily doses of white goop. So yes, after spending another $200 at that pharmacy yesterday I was extremely happy to say thank you & goodbye to them for good!
Next stop was CVS to pick up my prescription prenatal vitamins. Interesting thing though - they are not covered by either of my insurance plans. WTF??? We encourage women to take their prenatal vitamins (I've been taking over-the-counter prenatals for 2.5 years now to keep my folic acid levels up) and yet they won't cover them under the insurance?? Weird stuff! I still wonder if the pharmacy tech screwed up, because it just seems odd. Ah well, the over the counter ones are just as good according to the doc so maybe I'll stick with them.
And while at CVS I stopped at the Minute Clinic for my flu shot. (It should have been named the 45-Minute Clinic as I was 3rd in line which meant a 45 minute wait for a 5 minute visit.) But I must say it was convenient to just walk in and get it there and not have to worry about finding a general doctor, making an appointment, etc. I've had the flu once in 20 years so I generally don't bother with a flu shot, but knowing how dangerous the flu/H1N1 can be to pregnant women, I was told to get it, and the sooner the better. So got that taken care of.
The rest of the weekend I spent writing my term paper for my art class. I should be wrapping up my 2 classes later this week. Then I probably won't take anymore classes for awhile given that life is going to change gears when the baby arrives. Hell, I've taken classes here and there over the last 20 years, what's another 10 or 20 years? I'm obviously in no rush to get a degree, it's just one of those things I'd like to accomplish before I die so I've got plenty of time.
How am I feeling in general? Really only symptoms at this point are I burp (a LOT), I become suddenly ravenous and must eat immediately, and I would like to nap every afternoon. In the earlier weeks I was craving salty stuff (green olives, spaghettios, etc) but that has changed. This last week I just cannot get enough fruit! Any kind of fruit is good but cold fruit is best: melon, a mango out of the fridge, jars of the ruby red grapefruit sections. The other day I finished the grapefruit and then stood at the kitchen sink to drink the juice right out of the jar...can anyone say attractive??
Hope everyone has a good week and for now we'll just keep plugging along quietly and uneventfully!
Thursday, December 2, 2010
In good hands
OMG, I could scream - I just wrote a big long post and something happened with blogger - I lost it all. It didn't even auto-save like it normally does every couple of minutes....UGH!!!! Ok, so now that I'm so super tired and just lost about 45 minutes of writing, I'm starting over...sorry if I seem to rush through portions.
Today was my appointment with the MFM who is an expert in cervix issues and the appointment was GREAT!! I spent 2 hours with the doctor, talking, having the exam, talking some more, asking questions, etc. A 3rd year med student accompanied us during the entire appointment (granted I'm generally not thrilled with the idea of an audience staring at my cervix, but hey, they've gotta learn somewhere.) The exam itself consisted of a visual examination of the cervix, a pap smear, u/s, and manual exam to feel the portion of the cervix at the top of the vagina. Oh, and during the u/s we got to hear the little baby's heartbeat again (today it was 156 and still sounding beautiful.)
So after the exam we went back to the office to discuss the results. Now, a typical cervix is 3-4 cm in functional length. Mine is 2-2.5 cm so I've lost about 1/3 from all of the surgeries I've had. I also pretty much have no cervix at the top of my vagina. That's obviously where all of the procedures were focused so there's really nothing left and what is there is just scar tissue. But given those grim sounding findings, it's actually not terrible. In fact Dr D said we have a few options.
Today was my appointment with the MFM who is an expert in cervix issues and the appointment was GREAT!! I spent 2 hours with the doctor, talking, having the exam, talking some more, asking questions, etc. A 3rd year med student accompanied us during the entire appointment (granted I'm generally not thrilled with the idea of an audience staring at my cervix, but hey, they've gotta learn somewhere.) The exam itself consisted of a visual examination of the cervix, a pap smear, u/s, and manual exam to feel the portion of the cervix at the top of the vagina. Oh, and during the u/s we got to hear the little baby's heartbeat again (today it was 156 and still sounding beautiful.)
So after the exam we went back to the office to discuss the results. Now, a typical cervix is 3-4 cm in functional length. Mine is 2-2.5 cm so I've lost about 1/3 from all of the surgeries I've had. I also pretty much have no cervix at the top of my vagina. That's obviously where all of the procedures were focused so there's really nothing left and what is there is just scar tissue. But given those grim sounding findings, it's actually not terrible. In fact Dr D said we have a few options.
- We could take a conservative approach and not do anything. The doctor said there's about a 90% chance that if we do nothing the cervix will hold up just fine. He would feel comfortable if we decided to take this approach. The part that scares me about this option is that if it does start to cause problems, there will probably be no stopping it. There's not enough cervix in there to do a rescue cerclage (not that those are great anyways, but it wouldn't even be an option for us.)
- There is a type of vaginal cerclage that is done higher up on the cervix. It's almost as high as a TAC (transabdominal cerclage) but is placed through the vagina. What scares me about this is that vaginal cerclages can lead to infection which can lead to pre-term labor.
- The last option we discussed was the TAC. Some women like to call their cervix post-TAC a "bionic cervix" because it can hold in anything. This would give us the most piece of mind, but it is scary. It is a surgery, done while pregnant, via an incision similar to a c-section. It does require 1-2 nights overnight stay in the hospital so they can make sure you do not go into premature labor. And it will require a c-section delivery, because once the TAC is in, it's in there for good.
The doctor gave us these options but the decision was up to us. Part of us would love to go the conservative route and not do anything. But in the end, I'm afraid of doing nothing, having something happen to the cervix and losing everything, when we could have tried to prevent it with the TAC. So after some discussion between DH & me, we're going to go with the TAC. We just want to do everything possible to keep this baby in until it's full-term. We still have a few weeks if we do want to change our mind (the surgery would not be until January 3rd after the first trimester screening is done) but we're both in agreement that we feel this is the best option for us. (I know some of you may not agree, but hey, we all have different opinions so we can agree to disagree.)
Also in good news, this MFM is going to take me on for my OB care, woo-hoo!! This was great to hear - as a MFM he generally just treats the high risk situations, but he does keep a small patient load for those that may want or need the extra attention for their OB care. I told him about yesterday's dingbat doc and the crappy docs that were awful in February and he offered for me to stay on with him. I can stay on until I find a new OB or I can stay on him for the whole pregnancy, whichever is going to put my mind more at ease about receiving the quality care I've been looking for. (Can I just say I was thrilled with this and I was sooo happy to call that dingbat OB's office from yesterday to cancel my future appointments and say I'm going to a different practice! YES!!)
So I left feeling like I was in good hands. The u/s tech told me the farthest they've had a patient travel to come see Dr D for care was from Australia. People from all over have come to see him for his expertise and I feel lucky that he's so close to where I live. He gave me a hug before I left and said everything is going to be ok. And I'm really starting to believe that now!
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Heartbeat 167 beats per minute = BEAUTIFUL!!
So onto my 2nd post here for the day. We got back from the RE's a little while ago and what a wonderful (and emotional) appointment.
Our little baby has grown a lot over the last week. It's now measuring 7w5d (and we're 7w6d) so it gained a few days. The heartbeat was 167 bpm and oh that was so beautiful. And we were so awestruck, we completely forgot to record it! But it was just the best sound in the world. The doctor pointed out the head, the heart, and we could even see limb buds. Oh, it was so cute!!!!
Then the RE realized that that was our last appointment with them. It was time for us to graduate onto an OB/GYN. We started saying our thank you's and our goodbye's and I burst out crying. It was the doc who saved my last ovary at my e/p surgery in August and if he hadn't managed to pry that tube off of the ovary we wouldn't have been doing IVF. He helped to make this all possible for us. So it was extra special that it was Dr. V who was able to see us for our final appointment (and a wonderful one at that!)
Here are some pics from tonight's u/s and I'll be back on tomorrow evening to tell you how the appointment with the specialist went.
This first pic is measuring the 2nd sac. It's measuring one week behind and is still empty so eventually my body will just reabsorb it.
This second pic is the baby measuring 7w5d.
Third pic has the two sacs side by side.
Last pic was when we got to see and hear the heartbeat.
Our little baby has grown a lot over the last week. It's now measuring 7w5d (and we're 7w6d) so it gained a few days. The heartbeat was 167 bpm and oh that was so beautiful. And we were so awestruck, we completely forgot to record it! But it was just the best sound in the world. The doctor pointed out the head, the heart, and we could even see limb buds. Oh, it was so cute!!!!
Then the RE realized that that was our last appointment with them. It was time for us to graduate onto an OB/GYN. We started saying our thank you's and our goodbye's and I burst out crying. It was the doc who saved my last ovary at my e/p surgery in August and if he hadn't managed to pry that tube off of the ovary we wouldn't have been doing IVF. He helped to make this all possible for us. So it was extra special that it was Dr. V who was able to see us for our final appointment (and a wonderful one at that!)
Here are some pics from tonight's u/s and I'll be back on tomorrow evening to tell you how the appointment with the specialist went.
This first pic is measuring the 2nd sac. It's measuring one week behind and is still empty so eventually my body will just reabsorb it.
This second pic is the baby measuring 7w5d.
Third pic has the two sacs side by side.
Last pic was when we got to see and hear the heartbeat.
Not crazy about the OB
So I finally have a few minutes to write about this morning's appointment with the new OB. Let's just say I'm not thrilled. I didn't get a warm fuzzy feeling...at all. I didn't get that feeling of "I'm in good hands." That may sound silly but after having that one OB drop the ball in a big way in February, I DO want someone who is going to make me feel reassured. Maybe I've been spoiled by my RE's but I've gone through way too much these last two years. I'm not settling.
The office staff was nice enough, though I did have to tell the nurse my due date because she was a little confused as to how to calculate it for an IVF patient. They're used to calculating from your last menstrual period since most people don't know exactly when they conceived. But with IVF we don't go by the last period and we do know when we conceived - the day of egg retrieval is the day of conception. But I guess their handy little due date wheels don't take that into account. Anyways, from what I hear, people having trouble calculating an IVF due date so I'll let that slide.
Then I meet the doctor. At times she seems friendly and at times not so much. Little things like her order (and it really did sound like I was being harshly warned) that "You can gain a maximum of 25 pounds!" I felt like saying "And just what will you do if I gain 26 or really push my luck and gain 27?" It reminded me of years ago when I was pregnant with DS and had a month where I gained close to 10 pounds. Why that happened that one month I'll never know, but the nurse yelled at me and I cried the whole drive home in the car.
We then started talking about the screening for Down's syndrome, etc. I said that I was fine with doing the nuchal fold u/s (that looks at the thickness at the back of the neck) and any bloodwork but I'm not interested in any invasive procedures like amnio or CVS. She asked why. Why? Because if our baby has Down's syndrome then our baby has Down's syndrome. We're not going to love it any less and we're certainly not going to terminate. So then I asked her what else the nuchal u/s & bloodwork would screen for (in case it screens for abnormalities that would be incompatible with life.) Does she answer me? No, instead she thinks I should make an appointment with the genetic counselors. Oh for the love of Pete!!
Now I understand this could just be this one doc. I normally wouldn't base my decision to stay with or leave a practice based on a single physician. They have a lot of doctors so maybe I just don't feel a particular kinship to the one I saw today. But it was when we started talking about my cervix that my mood really started to sink. I had provided her with my history and mentioned that I do have a consultation with Dr D. tomorrow. "Why would you schedule that? He's not even part of our practice" is her answer. To which I say "Because he has a great deal of experience and I'd had another patient refer me so I would like his opinion." Well, whether this hurt her ego or just pissed her off I'll never know but she did not like this answer and said a few snippy things back.
She then went on to say that they have MFM's (Maternal Fetal Medicine specialists) on their staff if I would like their opinion (which I would.) But here's the kicker - her exact words were "but I can tell you right now, we don't generally do cerclages because there's no proof that they work. So you can make an appointment with Dr. F but a cerclage is not going to be an option he'll recommend." So, really? There's no proof? None at all? Now, I'm not stupid - I know cerclages don't always work, they're not always the answer, and heck I hope I don't even need one - BUT do you really completely exclude a treatment method from every patient in your practice because a doctor in your practice believes they don't work? Is each patient's circumstances not different? I guess not. So what's the back-up plan if my cervix starts to dilate at 18 weeks? No answer from today's doc, but I can make an appointment with Dr F to consult. Ummm, yeah, I called to make an appointment and they can see me on 12/22. That's 3 weeks away and sorry guys, with incompetent cervix time is of the essence.
So I'm going to get Dr D's opinion tomorrow and go from there. If it looks like I may need to go down the route of cerclage I think I need to find a OB group that is more supportive of that. I don't want to be frowned upon every time I go for an office visit.
Oh and p.s. - Our u/s with the RE got moved up to 7:00pm tonight so we do have that great appointment to look forward to with the doctors we love and we'll get to see our little bean again! Yippee!
The office staff was nice enough, though I did have to tell the nurse my due date because she was a little confused as to how to calculate it for an IVF patient. They're used to calculating from your last menstrual period since most people don't know exactly when they conceived. But with IVF we don't go by the last period and we do know when we conceived - the day of egg retrieval is the day of conception. But I guess their handy little due date wheels don't take that into account. Anyways, from what I hear, people having trouble calculating an IVF due date so I'll let that slide.
Then I meet the doctor. At times she seems friendly and at times not so much. Little things like her order (and it really did sound like I was being harshly warned) that "You can gain a maximum of 25 pounds!" I felt like saying "And just what will you do if I gain 26 or really push my luck and gain 27?" It reminded me of years ago when I was pregnant with DS and had a month where I gained close to 10 pounds. Why that happened that one month I'll never know, but the nurse yelled at me and I cried the whole drive home in the car.
We then started talking about the screening for Down's syndrome, etc. I said that I was fine with doing the nuchal fold u/s (that looks at the thickness at the back of the neck) and any bloodwork but I'm not interested in any invasive procedures like amnio or CVS. She asked why. Why? Because if our baby has Down's syndrome then our baby has Down's syndrome. We're not going to love it any less and we're certainly not going to terminate. So then I asked her what else the nuchal u/s & bloodwork would screen for (in case it screens for abnormalities that would be incompatible with life.) Does she answer me? No, instead she thinks I should make an appointment with the genetic counselors. Oh for the love of Pete!!
Now I understand this could just be this one doc. I normally wouldn't base my decision to stay with or leave a practice based on a single physician. They have a lot of doctors so maybe I just don't feel a particular kinship to the one I saw today. But it was when we started talking about my cervix that my mood really started to sink. I had provided her with my history and mentioned that I do have a consultation with Dr D. tomorrow. "Why would you schedule that? He's not even part of our practice" is her answer. To which I say "Because he has a great deal of experience and I'd had another patient refer me so I would like his opinion." Well, whether this hurt her ego or just pissed her off I'll never know but she did not like this answer and said a few snippy things back.
She then went on to say that they have MFM's (Maternal Fetal Medicine specialists) on their staff if I would like their opinion (which I would.) But here's the kicker - her exact words were "but I can tell you right now, we don't generally do cerclages because there's no proof that they work. So you can make an appointment with Dr. F but a cerclage is not going to be an option he'll recommend." So, really? There's no proof? None at all? Now, I'm not stupid - I know cerclages don't always work, they're not always the answer, and heck I hope I don't even need one - BUT do you really completely exclude a treatment method from every patient in your practice because a doctor in your practice believes they don't work? Is each patient's circumstances not different? I guess not. So what's the back-up plan if my cervix starts to dilate at 18 weeks? No answer from today's doc, but I can make an appointment with Dr F to consult. Ummm, yeah, I called to make an appointment and they can see me on 12/22. That's 3 weeks away and sorry guys, with incompetent cervix time is of the essence.
So I'm going to get Dr D's opinion tomorrow and go from there. If it looks like I may need to go down the route of cerclage I think I need to find a OB group that is more supportive of that. I don't want to be frowned upon every time I go for an office visit.
Oh and p.s. - Our u/s with the RE got moved up to 7:00pm tonight so we do have that great appointment to look forward to with the doctors we love and we'll get to see our little bean again! Yippee!
Monday, November 29, 2010
Bring on the expert
I didn't think I'd have much to write about before Wednesday's appointments but I was wrong. As I've mentioned before, I participate in a couple different message boards (one for women who have had a tubal reversal done and one for IVF.) These message boards have brought a ton of support, cheers, and shoulders to lean on during the hard times over the last couple of years and yesterday, one of these message boards brought me a great deal of hope about my questionable cervix situation.
To recap my concern about my cervix, after having my first two children (so many years ago with no cervical issues) I had a number of procedures done to my cervix. I had chronic dysplasia for a number of years. Cervical dysplasia is an abnormal growth of cells and is considered to be a pre-cancerous condition. In 1991 I had laser surgery on my cervix and that worked for awhile. In 1997 I had a LEEP procedure. LEEP is loop electrosurgical excision procedure. With this procedure, an electrical current runs through a wire loop and a layer of the cervix is removed in the affected area. Sounds great, doesn't it? Oh just wait...it gets better! In 1998 I had a cone biopsy. This is a surgical procedure where a cone shaped wedge of tissue is cut out of the cervix and removed to check for dysplasia below the surface of the cervix. The thought of that makes my legs cross...tightly! Then later in 1998, I had a 2nd LEEP procedure done. WOW, right??? Now to put this in perspective, women who have had a single LEEP procedure are often warned they may experience incompetent cervix. I've had 2 of those procedures, plus laser surgery, plus a good cone-shaped chunk removed from my cervix. It's no wonder doctors like to say "you barely have any cervix in there" and "it's just a nub of scar tissue".
So back to the message board...last night someone mentioned incompetent cervix in response to a post I made and I said that was exactly what I've been worried about. I told her my history and within minutes she sent me a private message. She urged me to be careful and proactive as she had lost twins to incompetent cervix and suggested that I contact this doctor that specializes in cerclages. In fact he helped to pioneer the TAC (transabdominal cerclage) which is actually a loop placed around the top of the cervix through an abdominal incision. This has a high success rate, but there is risk associated since it is invasive surgery. A vaginal cerclage, where a pursestring stitch is put towards the bottom of the cervix, is more commonly used but has a greater chance of tearing and infection and a lower success rate. I had heard of TACs before but I was unaware that they could be done while one was pregnant so this was exciting news.
Anyhow, this expert in the world of cerclages actually practices just a couple towns away from me. (The other doctor she mentioned practices in Chicago.) She gave me the doctor's email address and said he'll normally do a phone consultation with you within a day. So I sent my email last night and tonight, just before dinner, the doctor called me at home. We talked for a bit about my history and he gave his thoughts on options that may be available. Of course, he cannot give actual recommendations without a thorough examination (I'd be a bit weary if he did) so he asked if I wanted to come into the office this week for an exam. You bet I do!! So I'll be calling his office in the morning and will go for an appointment this Thursday in Camden. At the appointment, he'll be able to measure my current cervical length via ultrasound and have a much better idea of how much cervix I lost from all of the procedures, how much I have left, and the condition of what is left. With that information he'll be able to give a real recommendation on whether a cerclage should be placed and if so, what method we should use. Added bonus - the guy participates in my insurance, thank god!
Can I just say, WOW? This doctor who I have never met, responded to an email in less than 24 hours, calling me at home to talk to me about my history and sharing his thoughts on my possible options. WOW again! This floored me (seriously, how many doctors do this) and filled me with a renewed sense of optimism. In addition to the 2 types of cerclages I mentioned above, he mentioned a 3rd type that may be a good option. It's a different kind of transvaginal cerclage that is done higher up on the cervix so it has the benefit of not requiring invasive surgery like a TAC would, but has more of the "staying" power of a TAC. Of course, we'll know more after he can see what's going on at Thursday's appointment but already I feel like I can sleep a little easier tonight knowing I'm going to see one of the experts in the country that deal with the more complex cerclage procedures. I'm extremely thankful for K on the message board for passing along the information!
So OB/GYN Wednesday morning, RE Wednesday night, MFM (Maternal Fetal Medicine) Thursday...will have much to post as the week goes by!
To recap my concern about my cervix, after having my first two children (so many years ago with no cervical issues) I had a number of procedures done to my cervix. I had chronic dysplasia for a number of years. Cervical dysplasia is an abnormal growth of cells and is considered to be a pre-cancerous condition. In 1991 I had laser surgery on my cervix and that worked for awhile. In 1997 I had a LEEP procedure. LEEP is loop electrosurgical excision procedure. With this procedure, an electrical current runs through a wire loop and a layer of the cervix is removed in the affected area. Sounds great, doesn't it? Oh just wait...it gets better! In 1998 I had a cone biopsy. This is a surgical procedure where a cone shaped wedge of tissue is cut out of the cervix and removed to check for dysplasia below the surface of the cervix. The thought of that makes my legs cross...tightly! Then later in 1998, I had a 2nd LEEP procedure done. WOW, right??? Now to put this in perspective, women who have had a single LEEP procedure are often warned they may experience incompetent cervix. I've had 2 of those procedures, plus laser surgery, plus a good cone-shaped chunk removed from my cervix. It's no wonder doctors like to say "you barely have any cervix in there" and "it's just a nub of scar tissue".
So back to the message board...last night someone mentioned incompetent cervix in response to a post I made and I said that was exactly what I've been worried about. I told her my history and within minutes she sent me a private message. She urged me to be careful and proactive as she had lost twins to incompetent cervix and suggested that I contact this doctor that specializes in cerclages. In fact he helped to pioneer the TAC (transabdominal cerclage) which is actually a loop placed around the top of the cervix through an abdominal incision. This has a high success rate, but there is risk associated since it is invasive surgery. A vaginal cerclage, where a pursestring stitch is put towards the bottom of the cervix, is more commonly used but has a greater chance of tearing and infection and a lower success rate. I had heard of TACs before but I was unaware that they could be done while one was pregnant so this was exciting news.
Anyhow, this expert in the world of cerclages actually practices just a couple towns away from me. (The other doctor she mentioned practices in Chicago.) She gave me the doctor's email address and said he'll normally do a phone consultation with you within a day. So I sent my email last night and tonight, just before dinner, the doctor called me at home. We talked for a bit about my history and he gave his thoughts on options that may be available. Of course, he cannot give actual recommendations without a thorough examination (I'd be a bit weary if he did) so he asked if I wanted to come into the office this week for an exam. You bet I do!! So I'll be calling his office in the morning and will go for an appointment this Thursday in Camden. At the appointment, he'll be able to measure my current cervical length via ultrasound and have a much better idea of how much cervix I lost from all of the procedures, how much I have left, and the condition of what is left. With that information he'll be able to give a real recommendation on whether a cerclage should be placed and if so, what method we should use. Added bonus - the guy participates in my insurance, thank god!
Can I just say, WOW? This doctor who I have never met, responded to an email in less than 24 hours, calling me at home to talk to me about my history and sharing his thoughts on my possible options. WOW again! This floored me (seriously, how many doctors do this) and filled me with a renewed sense of optimism. In addition to the 2 types of cerclages I mentioned above, he mentioned a 3rd type that may be a good option. It's a different kind of transvaginal cerclage that is done higher up on the cervix so it has the benefit of not requiring invasive surgery like a TAC would, but has more of the "staying" power of a TAC. Of course, we'll know more after he can see what's going on at Thursday's appointment but already I feel like I can sleep a little easier tonight knowing I'm going to see one of the experts in the country that deal with the more complex cerclage procedures. I'm extremely thankful for K on the message board for passing along the information!
So OB/GYN Wednesday morning, RE Wednesday night, MFM (Maternal Fetal Medicine) Thursday...will have much to post as the week goes by!
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Thankful for a great Thanksgiving
Hi all! I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving! We sure did. We had much to be thankful for this year as you all know. We ate too much (well I did anyways - DH is better at moderation than I am when it comes to food.) We spent the weekend with my family. Got to see my parents, my kids, my granddaughter L (who is now walking up a storm), my siblings, and the nieces and nephew. Granddaughter M is due to arrive late February so my DD is into her last trimester now and she's looking fabulous. We just had a wonderful weekend overall. Of course, I think I was a bit wiped out after all of it - after our drive home yesterday I slept for 13 hours, waking only to pee.
Over the weekend, we were all talking about how next Thanksgiving will be even more crowded around the table as DD, SIL, and I are all pregnant. DD like I mentioned above is due in February, my SIL is due mid-May, and I am due mid-July. The thought of all of those new babies around the table brings a smile to my face - I just want to be more confident that that really will be the case for us. At this point there is still a giant "IF" in the room - "if" we make it to to the 2nd trimester, or 3rd; "if" baby A continues to progress; "if" my cervix holds up. I wish I could tame Nelly Negative and let Polly Positive run free, but we've just been tainted by the last 3 losses so I guess it's going to take more time before I stop prefacing every sentence that contains the word "pregnant" or "baby" with the word "if". In time I guess, in time.
To end on a positive (albeit bittersweet) note, this past Friday we made it to 7 weeks, 1 day. This is now officially our longest pregnancy to date since we've been trying to conceive. Just under 33 weeks to go now!
Over the weekend, we were all talking about how next Thanksgiving will be even more crowded around the table as DD, SIL, and I are all pregnant. DD like I mentioned above is due in February, my SIL is due mid-May, and I am due mid-July. The thought of all of those new babies around the table brings a smile to my face - I just want to be more confident that that really will be the case for us. At this point there is still a giant "IF" in the room - "if" we make it to to the 2nd trimester, or 3rd; "if" baby A continues to progress; "if" my cervix holds up. I wish I could tame Nelly Negative and let Polly Positive run free, but we've just been tainted by the last 3 losses so I guess it's going to take more time before I stop prefacing every sentence that contains the word "pregnant" or "baby" with the word "if". In time I guess, in time.
To end on a positive (albeit bittersweet) note, this past Friday we made it to 7 weeks, 1 day. This is now officially our longest pregnancy to date since we've been trying to conceive. Just under 33 weeks to go now!
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
A heartbeat...what a beautiful sight and sound!
Tonight's ultrasound was wonderful, beautiful, enchanting sight and sound. DH even did a cute little wacky dance through the waiting room as we left the RE's office. Can anyone say happy????
Ok, now you've noticed the post title "A heartbeat" and yes that is singular. Baby A is now measurable. It's crown rump length is 5.67 mm and it measured 6 weeks 2 days. We're currently 6 weeks 6 days, but a few days off is not a big deal. (A week or more at this early stage could be a big deal.) It's definitely progressed nicely since 6 days ago when we last saw it. And we saw that fluttering, flickering heartbeat on the screen - oh god, that was beautiful! DH and I were both smiling ear to ear! In fact, if a smile could wrap around one's head, that would have been us. The RE turned the sound on and tried to measure the heartbeat but we couldn't keep the u/s on the heartbeat long enough. But we did get to hear it, although briefly, before the audio would fade back out (at least the heartbeat on the screen wasn't fading out or I would have freaked.) By next week's visit we should be easily able to measure the heartbeat because the embryo should grow quite a bit in the next week so maybe we'll have a better chance of getting an audio clip for everyone (thanks for the suggestion Michelle!)
Now, onto Baby B. It really doesn't look like there's going to be a Baby B for much longer. Baby B has not progressed at all really since last week. The sac is much smaller than Baby A and there is no evidence of a fetus in the sac - no fetal pole or heartbeat. So chances are the sac will eventually just be reabsorbed by my body and we'll proceed with a singleton pregnancy. While it's definitely sad that Baby B didn't progress and most likely won't, a singleton pregnancy would be much less risky, especially with my questionable cervix. At this point we have the attitude that everything happens for a reason. All along we've wanted at least one happy, healthy baby and I tell you what - we are going to love this one baby like crazy!!
So here are some pics from today:
First pic is Baby A - fuzzy I know, but it was measurable this time and we did see the heartbeat - AWESOME!!!
Second pic is Baby B (on the right). The crosses through the sac for Baby B was where the doc was measuring and coming to the conclusion that the sac is measurably smaller than A (shown to the left of B) and there was no evidence of a baby in sac B.
Third pic is one from a distance - or in other words, not zoomed in on the sacs. This pic easily shows the size difference between A on the left and B on the right.
So next week I have 2 appointments on Wednesday. I meet my new OB/GYN Wednesday morning and we go see the RE again on Wednesday night. Can't wait to have another peek at the little one.
I hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving! Thanks for being here for me all of these months and the fun will continue, I promise!
Ok, now you've noticed the post title "A heartbeat" and yes that is singular. Baby A is now measurable. It's crown rump length is 5.67 mm and it measured 6 weeks 2 days. We're currently 6 weeks 6 days, but a few days off is not a big deal. (A week or more at this early stage could be a big deal.) It's definitely progressed nicely since 6 days ago when we last saw it. And we saw that fluttering, flickering heartbeat on the screen - oh god, that was beautiful! DH and I were both smiling ear to ear! In fact, if a smile could wrap around one's head, that would have been us. The RE turned the sound on and tried to measure the heartbeat but we couldn't keep the u/s on the heartbeat long enough. But we did get to hear it, although briefly, before the audio would fade back out (at least the heartbeat on the screen wasn't fading out or I would have freaked.) By next week's visit we should be easily able to measure the heartbeat because the embryo should grow quite a bit in the next week so maybe we'll have a better chance of getting an audio clip for everyone (thanks for the suggestion Michelle!)
Now, onto Baby B. It really doesn't look like there's going to be a Baby B for much longer. Baby B has not progressed at all really since last week. The sac is much smaller than Baby A and there is no evidence of a fetus in the sac - no fetal pole or heartbeat. So chances are the sac will eventually just be reabsorbed by my body and we'll proceed with a singleton pregnancy. While it's definitely sad that Baby B didn't progress and most likely won't, a singleton pregnancy would be much less risky, especially with my questionable cervix. At this point we have the attitude that everything happens for a reason. All along we've wanted at least one happy, healthy baby and I tell you what - we are going to love this one baby like crazy!!
So here are some pics from today:
First pic is Baby A - fuzzy I know, but it was measurable this time and we did see the heartbeat - AWESOME!!!
Second pic is Baby B (on the right). The crosses through the sac for Baby B was where the doc was measuring and coming to the conclusion that the sac is measurably smaller than A (shown to the left of B) and there was no evidence of a baby in sac B.
Third pic is one from a distance - or in other words, not zoomed in on the sacs. This pic easily shows the size difference between A on the left and B on the right.
So next week I have 2 appointments on Wednesday. I meet my new OB/GYN Wednesday morning and we go see the RE again on Wednesday night. Can't wait to have another peek at the little one.
I hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving! Thanks for being here for me all of these months and the fun will continue, I promise!
Sunday, November 21, 2010
New symptoms popping up
Hope everyone has had a great weekend! Ours was pretty good. We drove up to Trenton yesterday morning to pick up more Endometrin. I tell you, the $99.99 we're paying per week for this progesterone medication is a real pain in the hoo-ha, but at least I'll be getting weaned off of this soon when the placenta can take over production of progesterone. We then continued North and visited the Princeton University Art Museum yesterday to view some art & take pics for a paper I need to write in my art class. They have a really nice collection there and the campus is quite beautiful. Then on a more unpleasant note, today I worked for 4 or 5 hours. Blah! Now normally I do NOT work on the weekends but for the particular project I needed to complete, it was much easier to work on it today without email or instant message interruptions and I'm very happy to say it's done! PHEW!
So on to my new symptoms. Yesterday I was nauseous as hell! All nausea, all day. I never did vomit (thank god) but it was that kind of nausea that makes you break out in a cold sweat and you think to yourself, oh, this cannot end well. Wow, I felt like shit! So after our little excursion to Princeton and our lunch date at Applebees, I came home and went to bed. And that my friends was symptom #2. I crawled into bed at 2:30pm and slept for 2 solid hours. It was like I told DH I was tired and within 5 minutes I was out like a light. Now today, the nausea was back to just mild queasiness but after I finished working and eating lunch, you guessed it - in bed and out like a light. So a sudden burst of exhaustion around 2:30 in the afternoon is my latest symptom.
On Friday I did contact a new OB/GYN office that has a number of maternal/fetal medicine specialists on staff and my first appointment with them is December 1st, so only a week and a half away! YAY!! If I wanted to go to their office closest to me I would have had to wait until January 4th, but by driving a few extra miles I can get in over a month earlier. And with my cervix, a month could make all the difference in the world. Pre-term losses due to incompetent cervix generally occur in the 2nd trimester - often between 20-24 weeks. An emergency cerclage (stitching the cervix shut) may be placed at that time (if there is enough cervix left to stitch by that time) but it doesn't always work. At that point it just may be too late to stop the early labor. If a doctor decides to do a preventative cerclage, that is often placed between 12-14 weeks. Those don't always work either, but it's often safer to do them as a preventative measure rather than an emergency measure. So waiting until my 12th week to even have my first visit with the OB/GYN...yeah, that wouldn't be a great idea in my situation. December 1st it is then!
And of course we're still waiting for Wednesday night to get here so we can have our next ultrasound...we just can't wait to see how the little ones will have progressed since we saw them last. Can't wait to post another pic for you all! And lastly, if you'll be traveling this week for Thanksgiving before I make my next post, I wish you safe travels to your destination.
So on to my new symptoms. Yesterday I was nauseous as hell! All nausea, all day. I never did vomit (thank god) but it was that kind of nausea that makes you break out in a cold sweat and you think to yourself, oh, this cannot end well. Wow, I felt like shit! So after our little excursion to Princeton and our lunch date at Applebees, I came home and went to bed. And that my friends was symptom #2. I crawled into bed at 2:30pm and slept for 2 solid hours. It was like I told DH I was tired and within 5 minutes I was out like a light. Now today, the nausea was back to just mild queasiness but after I finished working and eating lunch, you guessed it - in bed and out like a light. So a sudden burst of exhaustion around 2:30 in the afternoon is my latest symptom.
On Friday I did contact a new OB/GYN office that has a number of maternal/fetal medicine specialists on staff and my first appointment with them is December 1st, so only a week and a half away! YAY!! If I wanted to go to their office closest to me I would have had to wait until January 4th, but by driving a few extra miles I can get in over a month earlier. And with my cervix, a month could make all the difference in the world. Pre-term losses due to incompetent cervix generally occur in the 2nd trimester - often between 20-24 weeks. An emergency cerclage (stitching the cervix shut) may be placed at that time (if there is enough cervix left to stitch by that time) but it doesn't always work. At that point it just may be too late to stop the early labor. If a doctor decides to do a preventative cerclage, that is often placed between 12-14 weeks. Those don't always work either, but it's often safer to do them as a preventative measure rather than an emergency measure. So waiting until my 12th week to even have my first visit with the OB/GYN...yeah, that wouldn't be a great idea in my situation. December 1st it is then!
And of course we're still waiting for Wednesday night to get here so we can have our next ultrasound...we just can't wait to see how the little ones will have progressed since we saw them last. Can't wait to post another pic for you all! And lastly, if you'll be traveling this week for Thanksgiving before I make my next post, I wish you safe travels to your destination.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
What a wonderful day!
Ok - work is finally done for the day, dinner is done, DH is playing x-Box, and our dog is chewing an incredibly stink bully stick by my feet. So now I am taking a few minutes to write more about today since my earlier post was hasty.
We arrived at our appointment at 9:01 (thanks to shitty traffic) and proceeded to wait 25 minutes for our name to be called. All the while my stomach is so flip-floppy I feel like I'm going to hurl at any moment. What a ball of nerves I was!! And BTW, it wasn't just me. DH had a hard time falling asleep last night as his mind raced at the thought of how today would go, all we're going to need for multiple babies, where we're going to fit multiple babies in our little 2 bedroom apartment, etc. You know, all those things new dads worry about when they realize "Holy shit, I'm going to be a dad!"
Anyway, they called us in, I emptied my bladder, hopped on the table, and the doc & nurse came in shortly after. Doc said her hello's and then said that because this was only the 6 week ultrasound we may not see much. She said ideally what she'd like to see by this point is a gestational sac and a yolk sac. And that if we saw a fetal pole or a heartbeat that's cool too, but we shouldn't expect to see those this early on. Ok, so let's begin. She puts the vaginal u/s wand in and starts moving it around. She said she's going to look around first and then she'll explain to us what she's seeing. I spot the 2 sacs as she's fishing around with the wand but I don't say anything (after all I could be wrong and I don't want to sound like a Miss Know-it-all patient.) So she then says there are 2 sacs and she points them out to us. She instantly spots the yolk sac in the more prominent sac in the picture I posted and at first says she doesn't see a yolk sac in the second one. Then she moves the wand slightly and says, "oh wait...yep, there's a yolk sac in both." WOW!!! We're thrilled!! So 2 sacs, 2 yolk sacs - AWESOME news! The picture she gave us wasn't the best one, but oh well, we're just happy to have this first pic of our little ones.
Doc is happy with the results and says we'll repeat the u/s next week and that one should be the "fun one". By next Wednesday night when we have the u/s we'll be 6 weeks and 6 days so there's a really good chance of seeing the heartbeats. (Still a chance that we won't see them, but good chance that we will.) And the doc that's doing the u/s next week is my fave, Dr V. As you remember, he's the one who did my emergency surgery in August and managed to save my last ovary. So that u/s will be Wednesday night at 7:45pm - odd that they'll be open that late the night before Thanksgiving and damn that's going to be a LONG day of waiting for that appointment but hey, we'll take it!
So where do we go from here? Well, we certainly don't run out and buy two of everything yet. I'm no Debbie Downer, but I'm a realist and at this point we've seen 2 sacs with 2 yolk sacs, but a heartbeat is what we need to see before we can really say "We're having twins". Even DH said he feels the same way - like we're both beyond excited that so far everything is looking great and it looks like we're having twins, but it won't really sink in and be official until we see the heartbeats. Because a lot can happen in a week - perhaps they'll both have beautiful strong heartbeats next week (would love this option.) Perhaps one of them will just stop growing and we'll be down to a singleton (don't like this option but it does happen often and we'd love one as much as we'd love two.) There's even still a chance that there could be more than 2 heartbeats. If one of the embies split, one of the sacs we saw today could end up having a set of identical twins in it. (This most likely will not be the case, but it could happen and scares the shit out of me.)
So yeah, we'll wait to see what happens before we go stocking up on baby stuff, but I do need to call the OB and get my appointment made for after the RE releases me in a couple weeks. Since I'll be a high-risk patient now for 3 reasons (I'm old, it's multiples, and I have a cervix that may need to be stitched up) this blog will probably be hopping the entire pregnancy with OB & perinatologist appointments left & right.
But for now I'm going to sit back and smile. We have 2 lovely sacs with yolk sacs. They are in the uterus this time so it's not an ectopic pregnancy. Within the next week, we'll get to see our new additions again. And then the very next day we'll spend a wonderful Thanksgiving with my kids, my granddaughter, my siblings, and my parents. Life is very, very good.
We arrived at our appointment at 9:01 (thanks to shitty traffic) and proceeded to wait 25 minutes for our name to be called. All the while my stomach is so flip-floppy I feel like I'm going to hurl at any moment. What a ball of nerves I was!! And BTW, it wasn't just me. DH had a hard time falling asleep last night as his mind raced at the thought of how today would go, all we're going to need for multiple babies, where we're going to fit multiple babies in our little 2 bedroom apartment, etc. You know, all those things new dads worry about when they realize "Holy shit, I'm going to be a dad!"
Anyway, they called us in, I emptied my bladder, hopped on the table, and the doc & nurse came in shortly after. Doc said her hello's and then said that because this was only the 6 week ultrasound we may not see much. She said ideally what she'd like to see by this point is a gestational sac and a yolk sac. And that if we saw a fetal pole or a heartbeat that's cool too, but we shouldn't expect to see those this early on. Ok, so let's begin. She puts the vaginal u/s wand in and starts moving it around. She said she's going to look around first and then she'll explain to us what she's seeing. I spot the 2 sacs as she's fishing around with the wand but I don't say anything (after all I could be wrong and I don't want to sound like a Miss Know-it-all patient.) So she then says there are 2 sacs and she points them out to us. She instantly spots the yolk sac in the more prominent sac in the picture I posted and at first says she doesn't see a yolk sac in the second one. Then she moves the wand slightly and says, "oh wait...yep, there's a yolk sac in both." WOW!!! We're thrilled!! So 2 sacs, 2 yolk sacs - AWESOME news! The picture she gave us wasn't the best one, but oh well, we're just happy to have this first pic of our little ones.
Doc is happy with the results and says we'll repeat the u/s next week and that one should be the "fun one". By next Wednesday night when we have the u/s we'll be 6 weeks and 6 days so there's a really good chance of seeing the heartbeats. (Still a chance that we won't see them, but good chance that we will.) And the doc that's doing the u/s next week is my fave, Dr V. As you remember, he's the one who did my emergency surgery in August and managed to save my last ovary. So that u/s will be Wednesday night at 7:45pm - odd that they'll be open that late the night before Thanksgiving and damn that's going to be a LONG day of waiting for that appointment but hey, we'll take it!
So where do we go from here? Well, we certainly don't run out and buy two of everything yet. I'm no Debbie Downer, but I'm a realist and at this point we've seen 2 sacs with 2 yolk sacs, but a heartbeat is what we need to see before we can really say "We're having twins". Even DH said he feels the same way - like we're both beyond excited that so far everything is looking great and it looks like we're having twins, but it won't really sink in and be official until we see the heartbeats. Because a lot can happen in a week - perhaps they'll both have beautiful strong heartbeats next week (would love this option.) Perhaps one of them will just stop growing and we'll be down to a singleton (don't like this option but it does happen often and we'd love one as much as we'd love two.) There's even still a chance that there could be more than 2 heartbeats. If one of the embies split, one of the sacs we saw today could end up having a set of identical twins in it. (This most likely will not be the case, but it could happen and scares the shit out of me.)
So yeah, we'll wait to see what happens before we go stocking up on baby stuff, but I do need to call the OB and get my appointment made for after the RE releases me in a couple weeks. Since I'll be a high-risk patient now for 3 reasons (I'm old, it's multiples, and I have a cervix that may need to be stitched up) this blog will probably be hopping the entire pregnancy with OB & perinatologist appointments left & right.
But for now I'm going to sit back and smile. We have 2 lovely sacs with yolk sacs. They are in the uterus this time so it's not an ectopic pregnancy. Within the next week, we'll get to see our new additions again. And then the very next day we'll spend a wonderful Thanksgiving with my kids, my granddaughter, my siblings, and my parents. Life is very, very good.
Double the fun with TWINS!!
Only have a minute here so I'll come back on for more later but so far it looks like TWINS!! I say so far because at this point we were able to see 2 gestational sacs and each sac had a yolk sac but until we see heartbeats, we won't know for sure. But what we did see were all good signs for only being 6 weeks along. The doctor was not at all worried about not having heartbeats and such yet since it is really early - as she put it "the next ultrasound is the fun one". So we go back next Wednesday night for ultrasound #2 and hopefully we'll see more development and heartbeats. For now, here is the first picture of our babies. I've circled the 2 sacs so you can see what the heck I'm talking about. WOO-HOO for 2!!!
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Big day tomorrow
Wow! Tomorrow we'll be 6 weeks pregnant! Can you believe it's already been two weeks since I had my first beta and found out we were "officially" pregnant? These last two weeks flew by! But the bigger deal about tomorrow is it's......drum roll please...........ultrasound day!
So here's what tomorrow's ultrasound will tell us. If you remember from my ectopics, when I went for my ultrasound the gestational sac was seen outside of the uterus. This time we want to see that sac (or sacs) INSIDE the uterus. Now that I have no fallopian tubes we have a much better chance of NOT having an ectopic, but you never know so that will be one thing they check.
At this point if all is well, inside the gestational sac they should be able to see, at a minimum, the yolk sac and a fetal pole. The fetal pole is actually the start of the fetus and the crown-rump length will be measured. At this point it's so small it will be measured in millimeters. But this measurement helps to give them the "age" of the fetus. For example, I may be 6 weeks pregnant tomorrow, but perhaps it will measure a little smaller, like 5 weeks and 4 days.
They will also see if the heartbeat is visible. The heart usually starts beating in the 5th or 6th week so we may get lucky and see the heartbeat(s) tomorrow - and boy, I sure hope we do. If no heartbeat tomorrow, it could just be too early and we'd need to go back sometime next week to check that the heart(s) has started beating. If we see that heartbeat tomorrow, we can relax (just a little) as we'll have made it through this first hurdle. Ok, in the infertility world maybe this is really our 100th hurdle but you know what I mean. Miscarriage rates decline some after the heartbeat is seen.
And then there's the million dollar question EVERYONE wants to know - how many are actually in there??? The poll is showing twins still in the lead so we'll see if that holds true tomorrow. Like I mentioned a few posts ago - it could be one really strong one. Or it could be 2, 3, or if some split after the transfer it could be 4 or more. We just won't know until the ultrasound tomorrow. Now if there are multiples and they're each in their own gestational sac, we'll know they were separate embryos that survived. If any multiples are in the same gestational sac, we'll know an embryo divided after transfer, thereby creating identical multiples.
So with all of that, now we just wait...12.5 hours to go. Now I just have to figure out how I curb this excitement to actually get some sleep tonight. Good luck with that right??
So here's what tomorrow's ultrasound will tell us. If you remember from my ectopics, when I went for my ultrasound the gestational sac was seen outside of the uterus. This time we want to see that sac (or sacs) INSIDE the uterus. Now that I have no fallopian tubes we have a much better chance of NOT having an ectopic, but you never know so that will be one thing they check.
At this point if all is well, inside the gestational sac they should be able to see, at a minimum, the yolk sac and a fetal pole. The fetal pole is actually the start of the fetus and the crown-rump length will be measured. At this point it's so small it will be measured in millimeters. But this measurement helps to give them the "age" of the fetus. For example, I may be 6 weeks pregnant tomorrow, but perhaps it will measure a little smaller, like 5 weeks and 4 days.
They will also see if the heartbeat is visible. The heart usually starts beating in the 5th or 6th week so we may get lucky and see the heartbeat(s) tomorrow - and boy, I sure hope we do. If no heartbeat tomorrow, it could just be too early and we'd need to go back sometime next week to check that the heart(s) has started beating. If we see that heartbeat tomorrow, we can relax (just a little) as we'll have made it through this first hurdle. Ok, in the infertility world maybe this is really our 100th hurdle but you know what I mean. Miscarriage rates decline some after the heartbeat is seen.
And then there's the million dollar question EVERYONE wants to know - how many are actually in there??? The poll is showing twins still in the lead so we'll see if that holds true tomorrow. Like I mentioned a few posts ago - it could be one really strong one. Or it could be 2, 3, or if some split after the transfer it could be 4 or more. We just won't know until the ultrasound tomorrow. Now if there are multiples and they're each in their own gestational sac, we'll know they were separate embryos that survived. If any multiples are in the same gestational sac, we'll know an embryo divided after transfer, thereby creating identical multiples.
So with all of that, now we just wait...12.5 hours to go. Now I just have to figure out how I curb this excitement to actually get some sleep tonight. Good luck with that right??
Monday, November 15, 2010
4th beta - 11,603!!!
I had a dream last night that the nurse called with my numbers and said they were 1099. And she seemed happy by this number while I was sobbing uncontrollably saying "you dingbat, that means my number went down!" Why I called her a dingbat, I do not know!
But dreams are definitely not reality today. The nurse called with my 4th beta results and as you saw in the post title, the result was 11,603!!! Doubling time is 50 hours and OMG, we are so excited. What a wonderful Monday!
And now we're so close to seeing what we've got cooking. Now we just wait for the ultrasound. BTW, is it Thursday yet???
But dreams are definitely not reality today. The nurse called with my 4th beta results and as you saw in the post title, the result was 11,603!!! Doubling time is 50 hours and OMG, we are so excited. What a wonderful Monday!
And now we're so close to seeing what we've got cooking. Now we just wait for the ultrasound. BTW, is it Thursday yet???
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Much better today
Definitely feeling better today. For one thing, I haven't been crampy at all, except for the pinchy pully cramps in the uterus area and I know that feeling IS normal and good. But no hot-period-feeling cramps today. And second, no spotting whatsoever today. Goop stayed white, Amanda stayed happy! I feel kinda silly for getting nervous yesterday, but then again after all of our losses I guess nervousness isn't so silly of a reaction. So today, feeling more myself, I got my hair cut (desperately needed a good sprucing up) and got through the homework I've been putting off for the last few days. Two things scratched off the to-do list, yippee!
I'll head to the doctor's tomorrow morning at 8am for my next beta and then start the intolerable wait for the results phone call starts. That wait is so yucky!! I swear, I carry my phone with me EVERYWHERE on beta day with the ringer on high. And despite these safeguards, I constantly check my screen to make sure I haven't missed a call. I know, I'm a nut!!
So, where do we want the results to fall? Thursday's beta was 3066 and this beta will have been 4 days later. So to have the number double within 48-72 hours, we want to see that number between 7726 - 12263 (of course higher than 12263 is super fine too!) Basic rule in this case - the higher it is, the happier I'll be.
And ladies and gents, just think - only a few more sleeps until ultrasound. We already have sparkling apple cider chilling in the fridge for after the event on Thursday and DH was asking me if I think they'll give us a picture while we're there. Hell, I'll beg for one if I have to. We just want to be able to gaze for hours at that first baby picture! So with our beta tomorrow and ultrasound on Thursday, I think this is going to be a very exciting week!
I'll head to the doctor's tomorrow morning at 8am for my next beta and then start the intolerable wait for the results phone call starts. That wait is so yucky!! I swear, I carry my phone with me EVERYWHERE on beta day with the ringer on high. And despite these safeguards, I constantly check my screen to make sure I haven't missed a call. I know, I'm a nut!!
So, where do we want the results to fall? Thursday's beta was 3066 and this beta will have been 4 days later. So to have the number double within 48-72 hours, we want to see that number between 7726 - 12263 (of course higher than 12263 is super fine too!) Basic rule in this case - the higher it is, the happier I'll be.
And ladies and gents, just think - only a few more sleeps until ultrasound. We already have sparkling apple cider chilling in the fridge for after the event on Thursday and DH was asking me if I think they'll give us a picture while we're there. Hell, I'll beg for one if I have to. We just want to be able to gaze for hours at that first baby picture! So with our beta tomorrow and ultrasound on Thursday, I think this is going to be a very exciting week!
Saturday, November 13, 2010
No pink goop this time
Ok, I feel a little less nervous. I'm still crampy but not as bad. And as I did my second suppository of the day the plunger was back to having white goop on it. That's right, no pink goop on the plunger this time! I'm sorry, I know that's such an unpleasant image but hey, I warned you when I started this blog that it may be loaded with TMI.
So say it with me now - YAY for white goop!!
So say it with me now - YAY for white goop!!
Good stuff & uncertain stuff
Well, I've got good stuff and uncertain stuff to talk about today so we'll start with the good stuff.
Turns out my rash is eczema. WTF - I already have 2 kinds of psoriasis, do I seriously need ANOTHER skin ailment? Apparently though, it's eczema brought on by seasonal allergies, which were pretty darn bad this fall. From what the dermatologist said it starts with super itchy skin which is exactly how mine started. But as you start to scratch it and break the skin, the eczema "rash" comes out. So he gave me a prescription ointment that is safe to use during pregnancy and with the first application of it, I was able to go for hours without scratching. Oh, it felt wonderful not to itch all night!! I should be free and clear of all of the itching within 10 days.
Now onto the uncertain stuff - I'm having cramping and spotting. Let me just start by saying I fucking hate this shit!! I wish I was one of those chicks on the TV show "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" who feels some pain, goes to the hospital, finds out she's pregnant AND in labor and voila, the baby's just fine and dandy. But no, we IVF-ers get to worry about everything from day 1. Oh hell, what am I saying? We have to worry about everything prior to day 1 when we realize we have to resort to IVF because we can't even think of getting pregnant without it.
Anyways, last night I had quite a bit of unpleasant cramping. I was pretty uncomfortable so I hung out on the couch reading for the evening, trying to take my mind off of the cramping. Warning - next sentence contains TMI. So when it was time to go to bed last night I inserted my progesterone suppository with the little plunger and when I pulled the plunger out, the normally white goop (from the melted suppositories) was pink. So it looks like along with the cramping, there's some spotting going on in there. This morning, still cramping and same pink goop when I put in this morning's suppository.
FUCK!!! I mean I know this could be normal. The suppositories can irritate the cervix after awhile and cause some spotting. But what makes me nervous is the fact that I'm having BOTH spotting and cramping. But again this is very normal in early pregnancy. They've just never been a good sign in my history. DOUBLE FUCK!!! So I put in a call to the RE's nurse line and I just need to basically take it easy and call them ASAP if the spotting turns into bright red bleeding. I still go back on Monday for my next beta and my u/s will be Thursday at 9am.
In the meantime I just keep praying and hoping and hoping and praying that everything is really ok. Prayers and/or positive thoughts are always welcome!
Turns out my rash is eczema. WTF - I already have 2 kinds of psoriasis, do I seriously need ANOTHER skin ailment? Apparently though, it's eczema brought on by seasonal allergies, which were pretty darn bad this fall. From what the dermatologist said it starts with super itchy skin which is exactly how mine started. But as you start to scratch it and break the skin, the eczema "rash" comes out. So he gave me a prescription ointment that is safe to use during pregnancy and with the first application of it, I was able to go for hours without scratching. Oh, it felt wonderful not to itch all night!! I should be free and clear of all of the itching within 10 days.
Now onto the uncertain stuff - I'm having cramping and spotting. Let me just start by saying I fucking hate this shit!! I wish I was one of those chicks on the TV show "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" who feels some pain, goes to the hospital, finds out she's pregnant AND in labor and voila, the baby's just fine and dandy. But no, we IVF-ers get to worry about everything from day 1. Oh hell, what am I saying? We have to worry about everything prior to day 1 when we realize we have to resort to IVF because we can't even think of getting pregnant without it.
Anyways, last night I had quite a bit of unpleasant cramping. I was pretty uncomfortable so I hung out on the couch reading for the evening, trying to take my mind off of the cramping. Warning - next sentence contains TMI. So when it was time to go to bed last night I inserted my progesterone suppository with the little plunger and when I pulled the plunger out, the normally white goop (from the melted suppositories) was pink. So it looks like along with the cramping, there's some spotting going on in there. This morning, still cramping and same pink goop when I put in this morning's suppository.
FUCK!!! I mean I know this could be normal. The suppositories can irritate the cervix after awhile and cause some spotting. But what makes me nervous is the fact that I'm having BOTH spotting and cramping. But again this is very normal in early pregnancy. They've just never been a good sign in my history. DOUBLE FUCK!!! So I put in a call to the RE's nurse line and I just need to basically take it easy and call them ASAP if the spotting turns into bright red bleeding. I still go back on Monday for my next beta and my u/s will be Thursday at 9am.
In the meantime I just keep praying and hoping and hoping and praying that everything is really ok. Prayers and/or positive thoughts are always welcome!
Thursday, November 11, 2010
3066 - Pretty happy with that number!
I jumped on here earlier today to tell you the great 3rd beta number, but now that I have more than 5 minutes to spare, I can yap away. So 3066 - I'm really happy with that number. As you recall from the other day I had hoped for 3185 or higher so there was that brief moment of "oh shit" going through my head when the nurse gave me the number. But my number is still really high for where I'm at (5 weeks pregnant today!) and as long as it doubles within 48-72 hours, things are looking good. So Amanda, no more worrying!! I think part of the worrying too was from being pretty crampy last night and today. Now, I know, I know - cramping is completely normal in early pregnancy. But I also know that cramping before I lose a pregnancy has been normal for me, so it's kinda hard to to tell this brain o' mine that cramping is normal AND ok.
I see the poll has been getting some action and so far twins are in the lead. I'm happy no one has voted for 4 or more, because the mere thought of 4 or more makes me weak in the knees. I did have someone ask how there could be 4 or more, which is a valid question give we transferred 3 embryos back in. But there is the risk that one or more split into identical twins or even more rare, split twice and turn into identical triplets. It is a risk though that the doctor had to advise us of prior to the transfer and while we both audibly gulped, we acknowledged that we were willing to take the risk.
So one fun site I love to peruse to determine the doubling time of my betas and look at beta averages is http://www.betabase.info. Fabulous site and so fun to compare!! Now remember, betas can completely be across the board - they can be really low and be multiples or be really high and end up being a singleton. So you have to take these averages with a grain of salt. But today I'm at 21dpo (days past ovulation which in the case of IVF relates to how far you are past e/r) and these are the averages that betabase lists from women who have reported their betas and had a heartbeat detected.
So next draw is Monday morning and like I mentioned, I should find out that afternoon when my u/s will be. In the meantime, I go to the dermatologist tomorrow morning about this ridiculously itchy rash! The b/w the RE took the other day came back fine so I can't wait to see the dermatologist tomorrow. I'm praying they can figure out what this is and treat it because it is beyond itchy!! In fact, I had to stop typing this post a few minutes ago to put on my 10th dose of gold bond powder today and put an ice pack on my upper stomach to try to calm the itching. This is just so annoying!! So I'll let you know how that appointment goes and then we'll all wait together for Monday to hurry up and get here.
I see the poll has been getting some action and so far twins are in the lead. I'm happy no one has voted for 4 or more, because the mere thought of 4 or more makes me weak in the knees. I did have someone ask how there could be 4 or more, which is a valid question give we transferred 3 embryos back in. But there is the risk that one or more split into identical twins or even more rare, split twice and turn into identical triplets. It is a risk though that the doctor had to advise us of prior to the transfer and while we both audibly gulped, we acknowledged that we were willing to take the risk.
So one fun site I love to peruse to determine the doubling time of my betas and look at beta averages is http://www.betabase.info. Fabulous site and so fun to compare!! Now remember, betas can completely be across the board - they can be really low and be multiples or be really high and end up being a singleton. So you have to take these averages with a grain of salt. But today I'm at 21dpo (days past ovulation which in the case of IVF relates to how far you are past e/r) and these are the averages that betabase lists from women who have reported their betas and had a heartbeat detected.
- Singleton = 1248
- Twin = 2520
- Triplet+ = 3450
So next draw is Monday morning and like I mentioned, I should find out that afternoon when my u/s will be. In the meantime, I go to the dermatologist tomorrow morning about this ridiculously itchy rash! The b/w the RE took the other day came back fine so I can't wait to see the dermatologist tomorrow. I'm praying they can figure out what this is and treat it because it is beyond itchy!! In fact, I had to stop typing this post a few minutes ago to put on my 10th dose of gold bond powder today and put an ice pack on my upper stomach to try to calm the itching. This is just so annoying!! So I'll let you know how that appointment goes and then we'll all wait together for Monday to hurry up and get here.
It's up to 3066 today
OMG, the wait for that phone call was intolerable!!!! They literally just called and today's number is 3066 so we're still doubling nicely. YAY!!! Doubling rate on this draw was 49.82 hours so just shy of the 48 hours I would have liked, but still well within the 48-72 hour range that they want to see it double in. Next beta is Monday! Will post more later tonight...
Monday, November 8, 2010
More on today's great beta and my scratching
I am still so happy about that call from the nurse earlier today...ahh...1126, music to my ears. Doubling time of 46.6 hours...beautiful! And I'm so happy I get to have another beta drawn on Thursday.
Now, last Thursday when the nurse called with my beta, she excitedly told me my number, told me to come in for my 2nd draw on Monday, and said my ultrasound would be around November 18th. So from that conversation I was thinking they would only do two beta draws.
Today a different nurse excitedly told me my number and asked if I could come back in on Thursday for a third draw. Is that what they always do? Is it because my numbers are somewhat high so maybe my ultrasound will be moved up? Is it because I've had those previous ectopics? I'm not sure what the reason is. All I know is that I'm happy that I'll have a third beta. One reason I'm happy about getting stuck again is that I'll be able to see if my numbers are continuing to rise appropriately. A secondary reason is that if my ultrasound really is the 18th, it will be nice to only have one more week to wait between the third beta and the ultrasound. (I know that sounds ridiculously stupid, but mentally these little countdowns are easier if they're shorter.)
So I mentioned a rash in my previous post and yeah, this thing is hella annoying!! I must backtrack for you a bit. So a few weeks ago I started having itchy skin, like REALLY itchy skin. It was primarily on my torso - the front part between boobs and navel. But there was nothing there...no rash, no bumps, nothing...just super itchy skin. My first thought was that maybe Tide added an ingredient that my skin didn't like, so I promptly bought dye-free, perfume-free Tide and washed all my clothes, sheets, and towels. Didn't help, damn it! I bought Aveeno soap so that I wasn't using any products with scents. No help. Previously being on the medicinal cocktail of stims, triggers, antibiotics, etc made me think maybe I'd had a little reaction. I tried a number of home remedies for itching including lemon (SHIT that hurts when you've scratched open the skin), baking soda & water, paper towels soaked in oatmealy water - NADA!! I wanted to take an Aveeno bath, but baths really aren't allowed in the 2ww so that wasn't an option (and many people still don't recommend them even though I'm out of the 2ww.)
Well maybe a week or so ago, I noticed my itchy area now had a very faint rash. It almost feels sandpapery in nature and it's not widespread, but I have a small patch on that original itchy area on my torso, and then little patches scattered around - one on my lower back, one on the back of my neck, 1 on a shoulder, etc. It's the weirdest thing! No pain with any of these areas, but all of a sudden they will get soooo itchy that I swear I would rip my skin off if I could. Of course when this all started, knowing I MAY be pregnant, I worried about what was safe to take. But I've tried Aveeno anti-itch cream, Desitin, Gold Bond powder, hydro-cortisone cream, Claritin, Benadryl spray - all pretty benign things, especially in small doses. Nothing works well, though I'd have to say the top contender is just the Gold Bond powder. But after using that I look like I just finished fighting a 5 lb bag of flour and lost.
So I continue to itch. I showed the nurse my rash this morning when I went in and said I was going to call my dermatologist about it but I wanted to see if they thought it might be medication related. She looked, confirmed with me that I had had chicken pox before (yep) and asked if it hurt (nope, ruled out her thought on shingles) and said it didn't look like a reaction to the meds I'm on now. They decided to send me back to the phlebotomist's room to have her take a couple more vials of blood to check for a couple of viruses that could cause rashes, like parvovirus (fifths disease). After googling it, I was relieved to read that it's generally pretty benign in adults and doesn't usually cause issues in pregnancy (phew) but really my rash does not really look like the pictures I saw online at all. Anyways, the doc & nurse recommended that I see my primary care doctor (which I don't have) or my dermatologist. So, I have an appointment with the dermatologist Friday...wow, don't do me any favors by getting me in before I scratch myself to death. Okay, I'm really just kidding but I'm not sure that I'll have skin left by Friday. And in the meantime, my results from the bloodwork the RE ordered to check for a couple viruses should be back by the end of the week.
Now that I've bored you all to tears with my saga of itching & scratching I will sign off for now. If you know of any good home remedies for itchy skin or rashes, please feel free to comment below this post. I'll try any suggestions I can get (as long as they're safe.)
This section was edited on 11/9 because of my terrible math and my realization that it will be 3 days between these 2 betas, not 2 days (I'm a math dummy): Thursday will be my next update with beta results. Ideally we want to see that beta at 3185 or higher (that would be doubling within 48 hours.) We could even see it at 2252 or higher and still be ok (that would mean it's doubling within 72 hours.) But I'll breathe easier if it doubles within 48 hours. So come on 3185!!!
Now, last Thursday when the nurse called with my beta, she excitedly told me my number, told me to come in for my 2nd draw on Monday, and said my ultrasound would be around November 18th. So from that conversation I was thinking they would only do two beta draws.
Today a different nurse excitedly told me my number and asked if I could come back in on Thursday for a third draw. Is that what they always do? Is it because my numbers are somewhat high so maybe my ultrasound will be moved up? Is it because I've had those previous ectopics? I'm not sure what the reason is. All I know is that I'm happy that I'll have a third beta. One reason I'm happy about getting stuck again is that I'll be able to see if my numbers are continuing to rise appropriately. A secondary reason is that if my ultrasound really is the 18th, it will be nice to only have one more week to wait between the third beta and the ultrasound. (I know that sounds ridiculously stupid, but mentally these little countdowns are easier if they're shorter.)
So I mentioned a rash in my previous post and yeah, this thing is hella annoying!! I must backtrack for you a bit. So a few weeks ago I started having itchy skin, like REALLY itchy skin. It was primarily on my torso - the front part between boobs and navel. But there was nothing there...no rash, no bumps, nothing...just super itchy skin. My first thought was that maybe Tide added an ingredient that my skin didn't like, so I promptly bought dye-free, perfume-free Tide and washed all my clothes, sheets, and towels. Didn't help, damn it! I bought Aveeno soap so that I wasn't using any products with scents. No help. Previously being on the medicinal cocktail of stims, triggers, antibiotics, etc made me think maybe I'd had a little reaction. I tried a number of home remedies for itching including lemon (SHIT that hurts when you've scratched open the skin), baking soda & water, paper towels soaked in oatmealy water - NADA!! I wanted to take an Aveeno bath, but baths really aren't allowed in the 2ww so that wasn't an option (and many people still don't recommend them even though I'm out of the 2ww.)
Well maybe a week or so ago, I noticed my itchy area now had a very faint rash. It almost feels sandpapery in nature and it's not widespread, but I have a small patch on that original itchy area on my torso, and then little patches scattered around - one on my lower back, one on the back of my neck, 1 on a shoulder, etc. It's the weirdest thing! No pain with any of these areas, but all of a sudden they will get soooo itchy that I swear I would rip my skin off if I could. Of course when this all started, knowing I MAY be pregnant, I worried about what was safe to take. But I've tried Aveeno anti-itch cream, Desitin, Gold Bond powder, hydro-cortisone cream, Claritin, Benadryl spray - all pretty benign things, especially in small doses. Nothing works well, though I'd have to say the top contender is just the Gold Bond powder. But after using that I look like I just finished fighting a 5 lb bag of flour and lost.
So I continue to itch. I showed the nurse my rash this morning when I went in and said I was going to call my dermatologist about it but I wanted to see if they thought it might be medication related. She looked, confirmed with me that I had had chicken pox before (yep) and asked if it hurt (nope, ruled out her thought on shingles) and said it didn't look like a reaction to the meds I'm on now. They decided to send me back to the phlebotomist's room to have her take a couple more vials of blood to check for a couple of viruses that could cause rashes, like parvovirus (fifths disease). After googling it, I was relieved to read that it's generally pretty benign in adults and doesn't usually cause issues in pregnancy (phew) but really my rash does not really look like the pictures I saw online at all. Anyways, the doc & nurse recommended that I see my primary care doctor (which I don't have) or my dermatologist. So, I have an appointment with the dermatologist Friday...wow, don't do me any favors by getting me in before I scratch myself to death. Okay, I'm really just kidding but I'm not sure that I'll have skin left by Friday. And in the meantime, my results from the bloodwork the RE ordered to check for a couple viruses should be back by the end of the week.
Now that I've bored you all to tears with my saga of itching & scratching I will sign off for now. If you know of any good home remedies for itchy skin or rashes, please feel free to comment below this post. I'll try any suggestions I can get (as long as they're safe.)
This section was edited on 11/9 because of my terrible math and my realization that it will be 3 days between these 2 betas, not 2 days (I'm a math dummy): Thursday will be my next update with beta results. Ideally we want to see that beta at 3185 or higher (that would be doubling within 48 hours.) We could even see it at 2252 or higher and still be ok (that would mean it's doubling within 72 hours.) But I'll breathe easier if it doubles within 48 hours. So come on 3185!!!
Great 2nd beta!!
Ok, only have a minute but our 2nd beta came in at 1126! WOOHOO!!! So the doubling rate is 46.6 hours (they want to see it double within 48-72 hours.) I go for another draw on Thursday morning so we'll again be waiting for more great results. I'll come on later today to write more when I'm done working (must tell you about this annoying rash I have, yeah, like you really want to know about my incessant scratching) but I wanted to at least share the great 2nd set of results with you now.
Friday, November 5, 2010
Still floating on air
Wow, talk about an absolute high yesterday after hearing that beta news!! And I still feel like I'm floating on air.
Now I know some people may think I should temper my happiness with a little more caution - as we all know what's happened the last 3 times - but to them I say, no thanks!! I mean sure, in the back of mind there's that feeling of wanting to stay grounded, to not get too excited until we know we're in the clear. But is that really possible??? Especially with this being our last chance I feel just like I did in the 2ww - that I want to enjoy every minute of this. My optimism is soaring and I really think this pregnancy is going to stick!
Oh, and I added a poll to the right in case you'd like to guess how many babies we've got cooking away. Plenty of time to place your vote as we won't know until the ultrasound but I can't wait to see the results of the poll vs. the results of the ultrasound! Have fun voting!
Well, now that I'm free from injections and appointments for a couple days I'm going to enjoy a little visit with the family. And then Monday we'll be hoping for great results with our 2nd beta!
Now I know some people may think I should temper my happiness with a little more caution - as we all know what's happened the last 3 times - but to them I say, no thanks!! I mean sure, in the back of mind there's that feeling of wanting to stay grounded, to not get too excited until we know we're in the clear. But is that really possible??? Especially with this being our last chance I feel just like I did in the 2ww - that I want to enjoy every minute of this. My optimism is soaring and I really think this pregnancy is going to stick!
Oh, and I added a poll to the right in case you'd like to guess how many babies we've got cooking away. Plenty of time to place your vote as we won't know until the ultrasound but I can't wait to see the results of the poll vs. the results of the ultrasound! Have fun voting!
Well, now that I'm free from injections and appointments for a couple days I'm going to enjoy a little visit with the family. And then Monday we'll be hoping for great results with our 2nd beta!
Thursday, November 4, 2010
We're officially PREGNANT!!!!
OMG, if I weren't pregnant I think I'd be doing cartwheels down the sidewalk. But after all we've been through, cartwheels are going to have to wait for about 9 months.
As the subject line says - we are OFFICIALLY PREGNANT!!! Oh God, that wait for the phone call with the results was intolerable, but at 2:22pm the nurse called to report that my first beta came in at a whopping 266!! That seems pretty darn healthy and pretty darn high for 11dp3dt and makes me think even more that there may be more than one in there. So as of today we are 4 weeks pregnant and our due date is July 14th 2011.
So, I go back for another draw on Monday to make sure the hcg level is rising appropriately. If you recall from August's beta process, the numbers should double ever 48-72 hours so that's what they'll be looking for.
If all looks good with the second beta, the next step will be the ultrasound on or around 11/18. Oh heaven help me, another 2ww! But that's when we'll be able to see how many are in there. We should be able to see the yolk sac and fetal pole and may possibly see heartbeats. I say possibly because at 6 weeks it's possible that the heart will not have started beating yet so that may not be seen until the second u/s - usually done about a week or so after the first u/s.
I know we've been officially pregnant 3 times before in the last 15 months, but I'm really feeling this one. I think this one is it!! And I think all the cheers, positive thoughts, and prayers from all of you have helped - so THANK YOU!!! Much, much more to come over these next few weeks so the excitement continues!!!
As the subject line says - we are OFFICIALLY PREGNANT!!! Oh God, that wait for the phone call with the results was intolerable, but at 2:22pm the nurse called to report that my first beta came in at a whopping 266!! That seems pretty darn healthy and pretty darn high for 11dp3dt and makes me think even more that there may be more than one in there. So as of today we are 4 weeks pregnant and our due date is July 14th 2011.
So, I go back for another draw on Monday to make sure the hcg level is rising appropriately. If you recall from August's beta process, the numbers should double ever 48-72 hours so that's what they'll be looking for.
If all looks good with the second beta, the next step will be the ultrasound on or around 11/18. Oh heaven help me, another 2ww! But that's when we'll be able to see how many are in there. We should be able to see the yolk sac and fetal pole and may possibly see heartbeats. I say possibly because at 6 weeks it's possible that the heart will not have started beating yet so that may not be seen until the second u/s - usually done about a week or so after the first u/s.
I know we've been officially pregnant 3 times before in the last 15 months, but I'm really feeling this one. I think this one is it!! And I think all the cheers, positive thoughts, and prayers from all of you have helped - so THANK YOU!!! Much, much more to come over these next few weeks so the excitement continues!!!
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
9dp3dt...Darker still and queasy too
The daily POAS fest continues so I can see a darker stick every day...I'm such a nut! But today's test was definitely darker and therefore things are still looking fantastic!!
I also spent a majority of today feeling super queasy. Now I've been slightly queasy since starting the progesterone and estrogen but I would classify today's ongoing bout as "advanced queasiness". It's probably too soon to blame it on pregnancy hormones, but who cares, I'm taking it as a good sign. As anyone struggling with infertility will tell you, we rejoice at the onset of any pregnancy symptoms, no matter how unpleasant they may be.
I also spent a majority of today feeling super queasy. Now I've been slightly queasy since starting the progesterone and estrogen but I would classify today's ongoing bout as "advanced queasiness". It's probably too soon to blame it on pregnancy hormones, but who cares, I'm taking it as a good sign. As anyone struggling with infertility will tell you, we rejoice at the onset of any pregnancy symptoms, no matter how unpleasant they may be.
- Puking??? Fine by us. We've prayed for the day morning sickness would start so we could kneel in front of the porcelain god and thank the heavens for good strong pregnancy hormones.
- Big, sore boobs? Bring 'em on! Reminds us that our babies will be well fed. We'd be happy to buy bigger bras that only fit for a week or two before we have to buy a bigger size - no problemo! And we're sure our DH will love the pregnancy rack.
- In a few more weeks when we can't fit into our fat pants anymore, will we cry? Oh hell no!! At this point we don't need to worry about fitting into those fat pants for another 9 or 10 months. We're going to put on comfy clothes that highlight this baby bump we've waited ages to see and feel. (And as somone who has not had to wear maternity clothes in 19 years, can I just say maternity clothes are so much nicer these days!!! We're no longer limited to tents and tarps...YAY!!!)
- Tired all the time? This will be good practice for when the baby comes.
- Peeing all the time? Since I'm an old fart, I already pee all the time so what's new? Maybe I'll keep a stash of internet cheapies so peeing all the time can be fun.
Monday, November 1, 2010
8dp3dt...BFP dark enough for photos
Ok, have to start work in a few minutes here, but wanted to post today's test since it was dark enough to capture in a pic. That's right - I did NOT have to squint, tilt the test, or stand in daylight to see the 2nd line today, WOO-HOO!!!!
The first is just the regular pic of this morning's FRER (Test line is on the left, control line is on the right):
This is the same test, but I used the auto-fix and sharpen features on photobucket to make it easier to see:
Can't wait for Thursday to get here so we can find out what our first beta level is!!
The first is just the regular pic of this morning's FRER (Test line is on the left, control line is on the right):
This is the same test, but I used the auto-fix and sharpen features on photobucket to make it easier to see:
Can't wait for Thursday to get here so we can find out what our first beta level is!!
Sunday, October 31, 2010
7dp3dt...IC=BFP, FRER=BFP
Yep, that's right!!! Both internet cheapie and FRER have a 2nd line so today's results = Big Fat Positive!!! Both are so faint, they're best viewed in daylight...which is why I keep standing by my sliding glass door to look at them. My neighbors would think I'm nuts if they saw me!
We know this early BFP is just the first step of many hurdles to bringing home a baby...making sure we have rising betas, making sure the sac(s) is in the uterus, making sure we have a heartbeat, making sure my cervix will hold a baby in, etc. Heck, we've had 3 BFPs in the last 15 months and you all know what happened with those. But this is an awesome, wonderful, amazing, beautiful first step!!!!
Once the 2nd line is dark enough to be captured in a picture (hopefully in the next couple of days) I'll be sure to post some photos. Sooooooo exciting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We know this early BFP is just the first step of many hurdles to bringing home a baby...making sure we have rising betas, making sure the sac(s) is in the uterus, making sure we have a heartbeat, making sure my cervix will hold a baby in, etc. Heck, we've had 3 BFPs in the last 15 months and you all know what happened with those. But this is an awesome, wonderful, amazing, beautiful first step!!!!
Once the 2nd line is dark enough to be captured in a picture (hopefully in the next couple of days) I'll be sure to post some photos. Sooooooo exciting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Saturday, October 30, 2010
6dp3dt...IC=BFP, FRER=BFN
At 5:55 a.m. I awoke and realized, oh crap I have to pee. Then I realized, oh I can POAS, let's go!!!
Normally urinating does not thrill me, but during POAS season it can be an exciting (or frustrating) time of the day. Armed with my trusty cup and internet cheapie test (IC) I was on the case and ready for some suspense. While the test was processing, I dumped the remaining urine from the cup, washed up, put my morning progesterone suppository in, washed up again (anything to kill a couple more minutes.) Then I looked at the stick and ever so faintly there was a 2nd line. Hmmm...very insteresting. I was just reading online last night that a BFP at 6pd3dt is most often twins or more because it's very early to get a BFP on a HPT. Yes, very interesting indeed.
I had DH look at the test when he awoke a little while later to see if he could see the line (thereby ensuring the line was not imaginary) and he could see it too. I always feel relieved when he sees it - because if he didn't, I would know I've gone off the deep end. Now here was my mistake. I shouldn't have dumped the remaining urine when I did. If I'd thought about it, I could have done a FRER with that same urine to see if that test came out positive too. But at the time I didn't think I'd even get a 2nd line on the IC. So when I tried a FRER a little while later there was no second line.
So what have we learned here? Nothing really. It could be that the IC test has a higher sensitivity than the FRER. Or maybe that IC was a flukey test showing me a false positive. Or because hCG is most concentrated in first morning urine (FMU) it's possible that the hCG in my later urine was't concentrated enough to register on the FRER. Either way, I'm calling today's results inconclusive.
So with that, tomorrow morning I will again grab my trusty cup and this time I will dip both an IC and a FRER. Until then...
Normally urinating does not thrill me, but during POAS season it can be an exciting (or frustrating) time of the day. Armed with my trusty cup and internet cheapie test (IC) I was on the case and ready for some suspense. While the test was processing, I dumped the remaining urine from the cup, washed up, put my morning progesterone suppository in, washed up again (anything to kill a couple more minutes.) Then I looked at the stick and ever so faintly there was a 2nd line. Hmmm...very insteresting. I was just reading online last night that a BFP at 6pd3dt is most often twins or more because it's very early to get a BFP on a HPT. Yes, very interesting indeed.
I had DH look at the test when he awoke a little while later to see if he could see the line (thereby ensuring the line was not imaginary) and he could see it too. I always feel relieved when he sees it - because if he didn't, I would know I've gone off the deep end. Now here was my mistake. I shouldn't have dumped the remaining urine when I did. If I'd thought about it, I could have done a FRER with that same urine to see if that test came out positive too. But at the time I didn't think I'd even get a 2nd line on the IC. So when I tried a FRER a little while later there was no second line.
So what have we learned here? Nothing really. It could be that the IC test has a higher sensitivity than the FRER. Or maybe that IC was a flukey test showing me a false positive. Or because hCG is most concentrated in first morning urine (FMU) it's possible that the hCG in my later urine was't concentrated enough to register on the FRER. Either way, I'm calling today's results inconclusive.
So with that, tomorrow morning I will again grab my trusty cup and this time I will dip both an IC and a FRER. Until then...
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