That's right - in 6 days and approximately 21 hours we will be having our "big u/s". This is also called a level 2 u/s so it will be a nice, long, in-depth look at our baby. They generally check how the baby is developing, look at the major organs, check amniotic fluid level, etc and hopefully - if our little one cooperates - we'll be able to tell the gender. It seems like the wait for this u/s has taken forever but in the whole scheme of all we've been through in this process, 6 weeks isn't terribly long is it? No. But we're anxious for that day to arrive to see that our little one is healthy and growing well and to see if we know whether to start referring to it as a he or she.
So what else is new here? Well, in 2 days we'll be 19 weeks pregnant which, since we'll need to deliver by 38 weeks, means we'll be at our halfway point. WOW!! Is it really possible that we're halfway to meeting our little one?? I get teary eyed every time I think of finally meeting this baby we've dreamed about for so long. Oh, see the tears build up just typing that.
I went to visit my family this past weekend and had a great time with my kids and my mother. (Missed seeing my granddaughter Lily, but she was a bit under the weather. Poor sweetie!!) DD and I were hoping that her little one would arrive while I was there visiting but no such luck. DD has been dilated 4cm for 2 weeks now but my little granddaughter Madison doesn't want to come out quite yet. Ah well, once she arrives I'll look forward to another visit to meet her and to help DD out around the house. And while I was away, DH was his true superhero self and put together the nursery furniture. That's right, he put together the crib, changer, and dresser and then dragged the old guest room furniture out by the dumpster. Thanks so much hun, you are a rockstar!! Now I have to figure out what else in that guest room we need to keep or ditch and once it's cleaned out we can start decorating. (Bought some wall decals over the weekend so can't wait to start putting them up.)
Work has still been awful. I generally have nice normal blood pressure but I have to wonder how (and if) it stays low while my blood simmers for 9-10 hours a day at work. I'm practicing a great deal of deep breathing and reminding myself that in the great scheme of life none of what I do at work REALLY matters. I mean, will anyone really remember a year from now (oh hell even a week from now) that I trained them on a crappy system? It's not like I'm performing life or death operations in my work, right? It's very, very hard to turn off my ridiculous work ethic and attempts at perfection at my job, but I can only make so much lemonade out of the rotten lemons that I'm handed. And lastly I remind myself that there is a glorious light - a cooing, crying, pooping, eating, sleeping, light -at the end of the tunnel. In another 19 weeks, I'll have a little one in my arms and I'll be away from the rotten lemons. Hopefully for a long, long time.
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