Is it Thursday yet???

Hello, friends and family! Not a hell of a lot to report today...just waiting, waiting, waiting for Thursday to get here for the next blood draw. The bleeding is still here and still bright red, but I have noticed the flow to be a bit lighter the last two evenings so maybe that's a good thing?? Cramps are unfortunately still present too. Let me tell you, I am so thankful I work from home. I make it till about mid-morning, then I have to move my laptop to the coffee table and my body to the couch. Once I'm horizontal, I slap the heating pad on and can continue to work the rest of the day with "less" pain.

I could try to distract myself a million different ways, but I'm telling you it is impossible not to think of what's going on. First I have the reminders that I am pregnant - my giant boobs, getting up to pee at least 3 times a night, and inserting my progesterone supplements twice a day. Then I have the reminders that something may not be right - "seeing red" everytime I visit the ladies room, having to use the heating pad to help with the cramps, remembering my numbers are still lower than average.

My message board girlfriends and I are really at a loss at trying to "figure out" (with our best guesses) what the hell is going on. We've thrown out some theories. Hey, it helps pass the time and I like to use the positive ones to keep my spirits up. Here's what we've got so far:

• It could be an ectopic pregnancy. If the numbers Thursday do not double or they eventually do not see any sac in the uterus, the evidence would point to this. Until we know one way or the other, I'll be on high-alert for any horrific pain, pain on one side, or pain in the shoulder blades (sign of internal bleeding.) If it's this, I'll expect to have the methotrexate shot if we can catch it in time. And if it is too late for the shot it'll mean surgery again to remove the ectopic and most likely my remaining fallopian tube. This is the option I fear the most, especially after February's nightmare!
• The tissue I've already passed is an incomplete miscarriage and there is still tissue growing in there, generating the hCG in my system. If it's this, I can expect a D&C if it can't resolve itself. I am not a fan of this option either.
• The bleeding is from a subchorionic hematoma - basically a blood clot between the membranes of the placenta and the uterus. This is quite common and can resolve itself on its own without affecting the pregnancy or can cause problems depending on the size and location of the clot. If it's this, I'm hoping it's one that the body reabsorbs just fine.
• The tissue I passed was a "vanishing twin" and now the remaining one is baking away in there, happy as a clam. I would gladly entertain this theory.
• My numbers were low because I just had a slow starter and now it's going to catch up. I would gladly entertain this theory too.
• I am just one of those weird ones who bleeds profusely (from where no one can explain) but the pregnancy is actually fine. Yep, while surely frustrating I could definitely deal with this theory if it means the pregnancy is fine.
• The pregnancy is fine but I have some kind of infection that's causing the bleeding. I have no idea what kind of infection would cause the symptoms I'm having LOL but one of my girlfriends threw that out there as another straw to grasp.
• Thursday my numbers will have dropped and we won't have to worry about any of the above theories because we'll know the pregnancy wasn't viable. Please no.

Well my friends, thanks as always for listening to my ramblings. If you have any other theories for me, by all means I'm open to as many straws as I can grasp. And as soon as I hear from the nurse on Thursday - good or bad - I'll be sure to post. Until then I'm going to continue to think positive!